PoULsoN FaMiLy Digest

Why Rush?

2011-10-17T11:57:00.001-07:00

WE traveled down south Saturday for a family get together, and pumpkin day with Grandma Sandy and all the crew. Although when we reach our destination with the girls we are glad we came, and have a good time, getting there is always a chaotic process.
Like any trip down to Salina, we leave with the plan to come home the same day. Down and back, is the motto and although we always end up staying longer then initially planned, we always stick to the game plan.
HOWEVER, this time... I woke up with a thought in mind, and found out it is true that your day is set with the thoughts you put out. I woke up Saturday at 6a.m. to Aaron telling me I needed to get going. I think I looked at him with the "one eye" stare/glare that said "I don't think so". All I did was snuggle up to him and sigh as I thought "why rush?" Well that is exactly how the rest of the morning and day went... a "LA TEE DA" sorta mood. Although I got up at 7:30, and didn't stop the entire time, we didn't leave the house until nearly 11, and we had to be in Glenwood by noon. NOPE...it wasn't happening, even IF we could go as fast as we wanted, especially beings Utah has to be doing road construction on every road in the state all at once!
It all works out though, we arrived safe, but not all in one piece. The little 3 were all a mess again, and I now have officially decided that doing their hair before traveling a distance does you no good & I will for forever now on, get them dressed, and WAIT till we reach said destination, this will cut down on A LOT of time wasted.
We had our traditional casserole in a pumpkin meal together, & let the fun begin. I had decided after contemplating what would be best for 30min, to sneak off while every one finished up lunch, & prepared to go onto the pumpkin patch there in Elsinore. I headed instead to meet up with my mom in Monroe where she was taking care of some things with my grandparents. We decided to talk over lunch, & took our time doing it. I felt rushed because I knew my kids and husband were going to be having fun getting pumpkins, and what if I missed a moment, but at the same time, I just didn't wanna rush moments and time anymore. So, I just let go off it all, and enjoyed the moment I was in. Works out tons better this way always.
I had intended to make it to the pumpkin patch before they left, but I didn't make it & I'll leave out the part where I tried but ended up southbound on I-70 somehow. BLAH! It all turns out though. I missed out on the entire pumpkin patch with m y girls, but I got a good visit with my brother Chad, and Grandma Lloyd. She's so funny & stubborn. She is so confused as to where she is at, and when she is going home. Chad and I convinced her she must be staying in a huge mansion. A caregiver kept passing by her room, and she'd say "who is that lady that keeps walking by, is she the wife? she's probably wondering why all these people are taking over her house" LOL! She also kept insisting Chad was hungry, and needed a sandwich. When we were little and even after we were grown, if we visited, she always felt the need to feed anyone who was there...this apparently has not stopped with her age cause she still worries over it. Chad kept telling her "Grandma I'm fine, I ate already" Grandma blurts out "OH BOLONY" Chad with his wit, came back and said "THATS right Grandma, I had a bolony sandwich" She laughed with her "your such a smartass" look on her face. IT was great seeing her, she looks so much better then she did before & a bonus visit with my brother made it even better. I left her room, & went directly to my Grandma and Grandpa Wheelers room, and said a quick hi and bye small conversation with them, and headed back to Sandy's where everyone was meeting back up to now carve their pumpkins they had gotten. I didn't want to miss that too, so I had to go. The whole way over to Glenwood I just kept thinking that this is the very thing I hate every time we our down south to visit or be at a family get together, is the rush! Go here, go there, run in, run out, never enough time, & we always leave feeling guilty, tired, & not looking forward to the next time even though we enjoy the time spent, its just never enough, and someone always get short changed, and we have to split up, its all just stupid. I had decided I'd bring up the possibility of just staying the night, and putting an end to the rush at least for this visit.
All my thoughts quickly stopped when I got back to Glenwood and walked in to a sea of pumpkins, and little kids busily working on their creation. Some painting, some carving, but everyone was doing something. Derian had decided to paint her pumpkin up like her "6th grade theme character" COOKIE MONSTER, and it just went from there. Ash did Elmo, & we were just one big Sesame Street bunch. I'll have to take a picture once we finish up the details on their faces.
The kids had a great time, as they always do. My girls enjoy their time with their cousins, which doesn't happen often enough it seems. It was getting later after we got everything cleaned up & after everyone left to head over to Michael & Grandpa Keiths for dinner we sat down & discussed staying or going. Why does one simple question that only requires a "yes" or "no" answer take so much thought and contemplating? If we decide to go home it means rushing over to say good bye to my parents quickly, and over to Redmond to hurry and eat with the rest of Aarons family, & then head back to Payson. If we stay, we take the "rush" out of it, & enjoy some time with family members that we don't get to see often enough these days. So, instead of rushing here and there to fit everyone in, we did decide to stay and take in more. It worked out great.
We left & headed over to my parents house where both my sisters were there, & of course had a good laugh. There's always shock therapy for them two when I'm around. I let it be known to them in a very blunt way after waiting for the perfect opportunity that in fact I have NOT had a booby job. I love watching their faces turn a million shades of red, although it don't take much for that to happen with those two, just the mention of "booby" outta my mouth & they instantly think "O NO, what is she going to say...do...ahhhh" NO! I did not expose myself, all I had to do was start to pretend to pull my awesome bra out from underneath my shirt and they run off holding hands screaming NO NO, put it away. Mom and I got a good laugh over this one... she'd been waiting sense lunch for me to give them shock therapy. Phewwwww glad we got that cleared up, lol. Never a dull moment.
Back to Glenwood we headed to let the kids have a sleepover with their cousins from Mesquite. It was a very loud house, & there Aaron and I were in the middle of all the little bodies spread all over the living room. We ended up making it to a bed about 1a.m. after the last of them finally fell asleep. Morning came to quick, but we got up & got moving, & headed for our last stop in Redmond to see Michael and Grandpa Keith. We had a good visit with both of them, & it felt nice just to sit & talk as long as we wanted to.
The decision to not rush & enjoy just spending time with family was the best decision. We still didn't get to see everyone & I don't think its ever enough time, but at least when you learn to take the rush out of things you take in more & just overall enjoy the time spent so much better. We ended up leaving our visit, unlike other visits, feeling at ease and in a better mood. Lessen in it all: DON'T RUSH through anything, make the time to enjoy every moment your in!

Ok, SO this time I am SERIOUS~

2011-09-27T22:50:00.000-07:00

So now that I actually have a computer that is working, I thought I'd try and update the blog, and start doing this again. Sense social technology is the only way I can stay in contact with my family, I guess I should participate :)
NO, I am not quitting facebook, its still my main squeeze. I love it, u know it, Aaron knows it, & I know it. Its my daily newspaper spiced up with a little bit of drama and entertainment. However, I do love journal-ing and you all know I'm long winded, so what a perfect place to express myself even more on topics, family events, etc.
A quick cap on the summer events... Our family was busy with dance classes, and performances all summer long it seemed like, but the 4 older girls had so much fun doing it, and Aaron & I had a TON of fun watching them perform and have fun. 3 parades, 2 talent shows & huge smiles on their faces! We did manage to squeeze in a few camping trips which are always fun and an adventure with the circus we have. We ended the summer with a fun day trip to Yuba Lake with the Monte family (Aaron's boss) & the kids had a blast! They road the tube on the boat, played in the sand, & beach water, soaked up the last of the sun, & had a great time. Then a quick day trip to Sevier Co to visit the family. I got most the day with Grandma Lloyd which as I stated before I didn't plan to spend but more then a hour or so with her, but time seemed to stand still as I was there, and before I knew it 3 hrs had gone by. I enjoyed the time I got with her, & Savanna made her smile which was great, but hated seeing her in so much pain, tough lady she is! We need to make more time to get down that way to see everyone. I feel like my family is MILES away and as much as we see each other you'd think we did live MILES away. The last of the warm weather fun we took a trip to LAGOON courtesy Lori, Grandma Sandy's friend. We had a blast! Its always a hassle getting anywhere with this crew, but once at the destination we always have fun. Derian and Ash were troopers awaiting their turn to go have fun after spending a few hours doing the "baby rides" I think dad was just as excited to go do the more exciting rides as the girls were. Aaron took his two older ones, and went & had fun on the "scary rides". Sandy & I enjoyed the 3 littler ones on the train and kiddy rides...watching their smiles and giggles was the best! As always, it ends up being a late night, but so worth it. The ride home we laughed till our stomach hurt. Releasing endorphins is good for the soul!
ON to the fall.... we shall see what it brings!
Now, I'm gonna go and mess with the lay out on this blog, and try and look all sophisticated as you all!

Trying this again.....

2010-11-11T21:01:00.000-08:00

Well its been over a year sense I updated our blog.... I have felt the desire to get back into it, no its not Facebook, but more intimate for the family, and a closure view into thoughts and doings of our family.
Sense my last posting, Savanna, the baby in that picture is now 17 months old, but the size of a 10mo old, she's full of life and personality, and CURLS! OH MY that baby steals my heart when she smiles.
Kymbree is now almost 5 (Nov 21st, Grandpa Lloyds birthday) A'jaye is now 3, Ashlynn 9, and Derian the tender age of 11. They grow to fast, this I do know, and the years go by so fast.......
My dad always said, "just like that" (while snapping his fingers) I always thought he was nuts for saying that, cause when your a teenager, time drags on...you wish for this and that to come, Well NOW I KNOW what he means....and although I sometimes catch myself hoping and wishing for the day to come that I can take a shower without some little one crying MOMMY, or just being me, dressed in regular clothes, perhaps a shower daily, and without diaper changing 40x's a day....I also know that like that song by Trace Atkins "Your gonna miss this" , I will miss these days, and I tell myself daily to just sit and enjoy the little things in life, don't worry bout the laundry, the dust on the wall, or this or that....just soak up the smiles, the giggles, the playing and reading to my little ones, and snuggles and crinkled up noses of my one yr old....the dust and laundry will always b there, but those moments wont be!
Things remain pretty much stable and the same with us...Aaron is still working HARDER at Central Body Shop, and is in need of his vacation time that he never takes, and I am back to being a stay at home mom that occasionally takes in some extra's. I am currently watching my neighbors young girls. He has one Kymbree's age, and 2 (twins) that are A'jaye's age. He approached me, and I have a lot of respect for him, a single dad of 3 little girls, he has them all the time, the mom has visitation and rarely takes it. He's a great dad trying to just make it in this life, going to school full time and now working full time. He' s a great inspiration. His girls are adorable, and sweet. I don't mind taking them in 5 days a wk from 8-3pm. ALthough I told myself I'd never watch kids again, here I am, still doing it. Its all good, I'm actually making more watching my nephews 2 days a wk, and these girls 5 days a wk then I did at Walmart full time, no sleep and crappy job environment so I won't complain. My girls are entertained with the play time for a good portion of the day, and I make some extra money....whats so bad about that?
COming up, THANKSGIVNG! I LOVE this holiday day. Its my favorite out of all the Holidays. I have to admit I don't like when people dismiss this holiday and skip right to Christmas, I think THANKSGIVING is the MOST important holiday of the year. GIVING thanks to our lives, to God, to our families is far more important in my opinion. Christmas, although I love it, is so commercialized, and about "things" rather then giving. Its hard not to get caught up in the "things" that you give to your kids, but this year we are going to try something different, MORE GIVING of ourselves then getting for ourselves. I have a trip planned to Primary CHildrens, a big day of shopping for the Angel Tree, and a few other things with in our ward I want to do. I think getting away from the "commercialized" I WANT I WANT....is crucial and a good lesson for my kids to learn, giving of themselves FIRST! My kids don't go without, and I'm grateful for that, I have a husband that is an amazing provider for us, he gives us all we need and more.... its time to give back, and to make this year an experience for my older ones, and an example and tradition for my younger ones.
Ok, pictures to come, new entries to be written....I'm back! YEP, the LONG POSTER, LONG WINED poster is back~

Our blog will remain "Our Lives w/Little girls" lol

2009-08-03T16:46:00.000-07:00

Gosh...
Its been so hard to get excited about blogging because I can't share any photo's. Only the stupid CELL PHONE photos. I can't wait to get my driver working again. UGH!
So I ask that you bare with me, I am trying to update my blog and I have SO MUCH to catch up on and I'll try to ad photo's where I can....
So, you all know that we had our 5th, and might I add FINAL daughter/child on June 21, 09, on FATHER'S DAY no less. The best gift that daddy could have gotten! I have to share my birth story and experience with you so just deal with it...if it gets to long, then deal with it! Its my story, so I wanna share it.
Bringing Savanna Vilate was THE BEST experience I could have ever asked for, being my LAST birth experience. Its been hard knowing that this indeed is our last, I have had a harder time with it then I thought I would although I know for sure that our family is complete. I was so ready to have Savanna. I was miserable, and huge, and hot, and swollen, and had NO SLEEP for about 2wks, but the last 3 days before she was born I really had NO sleep. It was wearing on me and I new that it was time.
We were scheduled to go into the hospital at 9am. I got up early around 5am just so I could have some time to myself. I am a very reflective person, and its very calming to me to just sit alone, in a quiet space and reflect. So I got up early to just have my own moment before everything got going. I had my moment alone and the day got started with Father Day wishes to daddy, nothing makes me more happy then seeing all my girls gathered around their daddy with smiles on their faces and Aaron's heart full. Its the best feeling.
My mom & dad showed up right on time at 8:30am. I had asked my dad to give me a blessing before we went to the hospital for this grand event. My dad couldn't have done a better blessing for me. I was already emotional this day, so much happening, so many feelings to deal with, and dad's blessing just eased my mind, and took my anxiety away. I really needed that, and I am so thankful he was able to give me this beautiful gift. I have to say that as he was giving me this blessing, I new right then that I was having another girl. It makes me cry to think about the feelings I was overtaken by, but I could feel Savanna's spirit with me from that moment on. She was defiantly ready herself to come into this world, and she was with me. Aaron and I headed out for the hospital, a long journey right down the road, lol..... he helped me out of the car, and we held hands into the hospital. As we walked down the long hall way of the Women's Center I said to him, " well babe, here we go, OUR LAST and FINAL walk down the hallway to the labor and delivery rooms" He was so scared and nervous I don't think he was enjoying the walk as much as I was....lol
We got set up in the room, and I got all hooked up to the stupid monitors and IV's.... they didnt' start pitocen because HELLO..... I was in labor already! Yea I was having some pretty good contractions all on my own. Around 10:30 my Dr, Dr Dewey came in and talked golf with Aaron, and then told me he was going to break my water...."WHAT" I thought we had discussed getting an epidural first...... I new one thing, from past experiences, once my water broke, it brought on PAIN, & lots of it! however, he broke my water and I was fine.... no major or unbearable pain, but then he said to turn on the pitocen and turn it up high.....WHAT??? O goodness.... here we go.
I got very miserable very fast after that. I finally gave up and asked for an epidural around 11:30 or so I dont know really.... I just new it was instant gratification once I got it, and I am forever grateful for the "epidural man" he's the bestest!
I was finally able to focus on who was there, and what was going on, and enjoy this experience. HOwever, I kept getting horrible anxiety and everytime the monitor made a noise I freaked out thinking something was wrong with the baby. We had just a few small scares, but it sent Aaron and I into panic mode. My mom and girls showed up, and as my mom was sitting there talking with me, and by my side, I had a really wierd feeling, they had just checked me and I was at a 5 they figured it would be awhile, so my Dr went on home to wait for the call to come back. I felt really wierd, and some pressure so the nurses came running in, and said they were going to chk me again.....well I was at a 7 and a half at this point. I really was feeling like this baby was coming really soon. just a few minutes later they came back in and checked me and I was ready to go....it happened that fast. Dr Dewey came in, they started getting the bed ready, Dr Dewey told me to push with the contractions I felt, as he was getting himself ready for the delivery, I pushed twice while Aaron helped me, and Dr Dewey walked over took his position, told me to push, I did that twice, and there she was..... Aaron just was soooo relieved that he didn't have to watch me go through the hell I went through with A'jaye. We just cried together feeling so relieved that it was over, and we had NO trouble. I watched Aaron take our baby girl over to the scales, and he just had this look on his face that told me he felt so PROUD, and so blessed. SHe had so much dark hair, and olive skin tone, she was just beautiful.
THE CUTEST THING though that I remember from her birth was my 3 girls, Derian, Ashlynn and Kymbree standing behind the curtain awaiting the birth of their brother or sister and Kymbree hearing the first cry's from baby Savanna and her cute little excited squeel .....she just was sooo excited to hear that baby cry, and it was the sweetest sound! I could hear them all..."its a girl, really its a girl"
I have to say that not knowing what this baby was, was truly the best experience we've had. It brought a sense of excitement to the delivery and to the pregnancy. I would do that again in a heartbeat! Although I new in my heart after dad's blessing that we were having another girl, it was still exciting.
After all the excitment of the easy delilvery the wrapped her up and brought her over to me, gosh there's nothing better then holding your newborn that you worked so hard to bring into the world. Its a mother's best accomplishment in my opinion. Aaron took her, and was holding her, all the girls gathered around their dad and baby sister, and I looked over and tears filled my eyes as I looked at Aaorn with all his girls, gosh how did he become so blessed? We chuckle and tease that God is punishing him, or that he's dumed with all these girls..... but the man couldn't be prouder of all these girls. I just hugged him tight after everyone left and told him that God gave him a job in this life, and he new that he was the man for the job, he's the best daddy to little girls, and he won't fail them. It takes a special dad to be a daddy to little girls, and he does an amazing job with them.
SO, thats my birth story.... SO EASY! I felt great afterwards and was ready to go home THE NEXT MORNING! but I stayed even though I didn't want to. When I was released and ready to go, the nurse came in only to tell me that our baby couldn't go home just yet. SHe had tested positive for Kooms disease which is just a bad case of jaundice so she had to go under the lights and stay under the lights for at least 24hrs. I made the decision to go home anyhow and just come and feed her and hold her as much as I could. I wasn't getting any rest at the hospital and was just ready to go home. I wouldn't be able to hold her that much anyhow, so I went home. I made a trip in every 3hrs to hold her, and feed her. It was tough not being able to bring her home with us right away, but we new she had to get better. SHe did well, and was home on Wednesday night.
The first days with her home were tough. She cried a lot due to the jaundice. I dont know how we made it though those first few days. There's NO WAY I could've done it with all my girls home I know that. I am so thankful for my parents taking the girls all that week. It was truly the best gift EVER. Although I missed them dearly, the time with Savanna was very much needed.
We survived the first wk of her being with us. Time flies by it seems. I dont want her to get any bigger. I am trying to enjoy her being a newborn because this is my last baby. Everyday I enjoy with her, and I savor it all! They change so fast that you can't keep up it seems.
WE love her so much.... she is such a blessing to our family and a perfect ending to our baby days.....
Ok....fam I promise I'll do better w/the blog, I tell ya, if you want updates, facebook is where to get them...its faster, and simple and quick. I can update, there and all I have is a few minutes each time I sit down....but I still love to blog, and I will do my best to keep it up, its just harder now days..... stay patient with me, I'll get back to normal some day. Love ya all

Life has been hectic....

2009-06-05T23:00:00.000-07:00

Ok, well.... I know I haven't been blogging lately, but I love Facebook more now. lol JK, I haven't been able to get any new pics on my computer so its hard to want to blog when you can't share photos of any of the fun stuff we've been doing.
We've done a few fun things too. We took the kids fishing and on a picnic which was just fun. We didn't go far, just down to Salem ponds, and the only thing we caught was a snapping turtle, but hey the kids had fun the rest of the day playing with this turtle, and begging us to keep it. We broke their hearts and had to tell them NO.... their dirty, stinky and THEY BITE! GEEZ! I'd have to worry about the turtle taking off a finger or something, NO THANX!
We bbq'd our favorite hamburgers for everyone and of course they were a hit, like always. Aaron is getting pretty dang good on that grill, and he loves coming up with new things, and new ways to bbq things. I love summer time cuz he cooks alot.
What else has been going on..... Aaron and the girls have a Sunday morning tradition lately. They get up and go for the "T" time on the golf course. They have so much fun too, and I love that they spend time together doing something fun that they all love to do. I guess I shouldn't say Aaron and the girls, cuz that sounds like Aaron and ALL the girls, NOPE.....he just takes the older two and that's ok, cuz they don't get a whole lot of time alone with their daddy, and they miss that sometimes. They come back all laughing together and talking about their crashing the golf cart, and daddy missing the ball... and all the awesome deer they spotted along the way. I really love it that they have fun together. I love that they spend time like that with their dad. The last two Sundays they haven't made it home in time for primary but u know what, that's ok. Family time is good time too. In fact last Sunday, they were gone from 11am and didn't get home till nearly 5pm. They did the entire 18 hole coarse and spent so much down time spotting the deer, and bunny rabbits, and wrecking the golf cart that it took forever! but they had an awesome time.
The kids got out of school and this was their first week home. I have to say that its SOOO Nice to have them here with me. My days are so much better with them all here. The older two have helped out so much entertaining the little ones. Plus they have helped me with daily chores, which has been nice. & they've had time to have some fun too, cuz they are kids, and not child slaves, lol.
Derian has spent alot of time out with her friend Ashley. She lives on a farm sorta, and they have so much fun out there. She told me it reminds her of Redmond. Ashlynn has also been spending alot of time with her friend Maggie doing sleepover's and play days. They have so much fun together. My kids have fabulous friends and that's nice for me not having to worry about who they are hanging out with. I think its going to be an amazing summer. I already have the kids on a routine, and we've stuck to it almost everyday, and it just makes things go more smoothly. We all get up get some breakfast, and get after our chores, and laundry, I've made a deal with them that they help me out till after lunch and then the day is theirs to do what they want with in reason of course, lol. Its worked out nicely, and we all seem to be in a better mood this way. I think we'll stick to it.
We recently went down to Aurora for a Lloyd Family reunion. WOW! It was sure nice to see everyone. I just kept looking at all the family thinking, what a legacy my grandparents have started, and it continues. I kept thinking about Grandpa Lloyd and how I'm sure he was looken down on all of us, with the proud face on. It sorta brought a tear to my eye as we were all gathered around the tables getten ready to surprise Grandma, she walked in and we all yelled SURPRISE.... just looking at her, I could almost see my Grandpa Lloyd next to her, walking along side her. It made me miss him.... but i know he was with us that day, and he was just as proud as ever of his family.
It was nice to see everyone. Its to bad we don't get together more often then every 15yrs or so, lol.
Well, baby is due in 11 days, or rather, not due, but is coming in 11 days regardless of whether it wants to or not. I'm having mixed feelings about it all. I go through periods that I'm excited and anxious to hold my baby and have him/her in my arms but at the same time I am scarred to death to go through it all to get this baby here. With my bad experience with A'jaye from beginning to end, I worry about it all happening again. My epidural was painful, the IV was painful, the labor was painful and scary it makes me all apprehensive. Also, I am uptight about having 5 kids, and having these last 3 so close together. I struggle so much with Kymbree and A'jaye to the point of tears some days & now I have to add another. I took the kids to the pool a couple days ago for the first time. I love going to the pool, last year we had so much fun going, and Payson has a nice facility. However, going with 2 toddlers this year instead of one, all I did was chase Kymbree and A'jaye and if one wasn't crying the other one was, and if the other wasn't running off, the other one was. I was going crazy trying to keep up with the two little ones, how the hell will I do 3 of them. I had promised the girls we'd go to the pool alot this summer cuz we all love it so much, but I'm thinking twice about that now. I hate putting some of the load on my older two, but they are so good to pitch in with out me asking. Ashlynn was so good to help me out on the way out to the car, it just made me cry, that she just took that initiative and helped me cuz she new I was so tired. I just looked at her and felt so sad that I don't have more time to give to each one of them like I want too. Someone always gets shortchanged, and its usually my older two. I had a good meltdown that night, and Aaron had to listen to me boob for ahour but I felt better.... lol. I guess I'll figure it out and do what I have to do. I don't ever remember it being this hard when Derian & Ashlynn were little I guess that proves the differences in personalities. Kymbree is just the cutest kid ever, she makes us laugh, but she also makes us cry, ALL OF US! She's just full of life....& sometimes its not so fun.
Despite how crazy I am feeling about having 5 kids to care for I do feel like all my kids are blessings, and meant to be apart of our lives and somehow Aaron and I will find the time to give them each what they need I hope. We are truly blessed with amazing kids, and each one brings a special gift to our family. YES they make me nuts, but I love them more then anything!

Sorry there's no pictures, but we'll get some up at some point. I don't know that I'll blog again before baby comes we'll save it for when baby comes.... SO until next time....

Oh wait....I do have to add that we went to the Hogle Zoo this past weekend with Aaron's sister Chrissy and her 3 awesome kids, and Grandma Sandy. I have to be honest, I really didn't want to go, I was fighting it, and trying to find an excuse to not go (sorry guys...) I just wasn't in the mood for the heat, the crowd, the walking, the dragging 4 kids out, but we went, & I have to tell you I am so glad I did. It was just a great day out with the kids and their cousins. The weather couldn't have been better, the crowd wasn't that bad, & the company was even better. A'jaye was so fun to watch as she squealed at the monkey's swinging towards her, and she'd get so excited to see all the animals. Kymbree was on good behavior and Grandma Sandy kept check on her for me (maybe that is why she was behaving well....she seems to be good for other ppl) . It was just a lot of fun, and I am so glad the kids got to spend some time together. Thanks Chrissy and Sandy for an awesome day out.... I am really glad we went.

A Mother's Day Tribute.....

2009-05-08T22:07:00.000-07:00

Oh my goodness. Aaron and I are extremely blessed when it comes to the Mother's in our life. Not only do we have my mom, his mom but we also are very blessed with a wonderful 3rd mom too. I guess most would technically call her Step Mom but I never liked that term so we just call her mom too. We also have been blessed with grandma's that are a great gift to us.

There are a lot of wonderful women on both of our family sides and we are so grateful for each and every one of them.

I could talk about all of them, right down to the great grandma's and many aunts we have, but I am going to keep it at the Mom's for this......

I'll start with Susan. She came into Kurt's life when Ashlynn was just a baby or at least that is when they started dating I guess. She was a co-worker of his for years. I liked her instantly & so did Aaron. They got married, and had a fun wedding. Her and Kurt are just a blast to be around. We always have an amazing time when we are with them. Susan has got Kurt involved with all his kids & she LOVES to have family get togethers and have us visit them. She is so caring and we always have an email or we get a phone call to see how we are and how the kids are. Susan has a kind heart, and a caring heart, and a nurturing nature. She makes us laugh with all her funny "kid" comments and the kids laugh too, cuz they know Grandma really wouldn't duct tape them to a chair...haha. My kids took to her really fast, and love her so much. When she married Kurt, she not only took on a husband but she also took on an entire family of kids and grandkids, and she has loved us and cared for us all as if she was always there. That is something I really admire about her. She really cares about all of us. Thanks Susan for all you do for our family, and the love and support you've given us. We love you!

Aarons mom Sandy is another great inspiration to our family. Aaron has a lot of respect and love for his mom and she has made him a man that I love beyond measure. Sandy is like another mom to me, I've had her apart of my life now for half my life so of course I also have a lot of respect and love for her as a mom, a mother in law, and a friend. She loves us, and cares a great deal for us and has given us alot of support over the years. She loves her grand girls...right down to our dog zoey...she even calls her her grand-dogdaughter, lol. The girls adore her & love her so much & so do we!

Thanx mom for all your love & support thru out our lives, now and in the past! You've always been there for us in our good times and our bad, and we appreciate you! We love & respect the women you are & our very proud your our mom! From a daughter in law to her Mother in law THANK YOU for bringing up a son that I love & respect and whom takes care of his family as he does. Thank you for being a supportive Mom in law and being there for me. I see you as a mother, not a mother in law, and you are also a very close friend too! WE LOVE YOU!

TO my mom..... This one is a little bit special to me, as it should, she is my mother, she gave birth to me, raised me and has been there for me all my life & now she is there for not only me but her grand-daughters, and son in law. Mom, your not only my mother whom I respect as such but you are one of my best friends. You are a friend that I want to call when something exciting, sad, stressful, bad, happy happens to me. I love our talks & I miss that we dont do that as much anymore. I know life gets in the way, but there isn't a day that goes by that I dont think of you at least a handful of times even if I dont talk to you. You've done so much to help my family, which in turn helps me thru out the years of my life & I honestly don't know how I'd get thru most of it w/out you! Your a strong women, a caring women, a giving women. You give of yourself even when you dont have the strength to do so. You love your family, your kids with all your heart, and it shows in your actions, words & thoughts everyday. My girls adore you & love to visit with you.

You've made my life a better world & I can never repay you for that. Its such a blessing and a comfort just to know that if I need you to fall back on you are there. As I've mentioned MANY times just having you in the area calms me down.... I know you havent been in the room with me during each birth I've given but seeing your hands on the door, or knowing your htere by the door makes me feel better, it brings a calming to my soul that only a mother can bring. THANK YOU for being there, THANK YOU for all you've done in my life. I love you beyond measure.

As I've said, Aaron and I are so blessed with many great women in our life & THANK YOU for being such wonderful blessings to us & our children!!!!

WE LOVE YOU ALL!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRANDPA KEITH!!!!

2009-05-06T09:00:00.000-07:00

Gosh, its been a busy two months with all these birthdays we've had recently, but birthdays are a time to tell a person in your life how important they are to you& thats always a fun thing to do.
My blog lately has been all birthday posts, but as I mentioned they are fun to post. We just had Grandpa Lloyd's birthday, now we have Grandpa Keith's birthday! The girls had fun talking back and forth about fun memories of their grandpa's. Here are some of their responses about Grandpa Keith and what he means to them.....

Derian: " Its fun to go to Grandpa Keiths, & when he takes us down to the horses its so much fun!
Ashlynn: "Grandpa makes yummy breakfast for us, & I like to spend time with him at the horses"
Kymbree: Papa has a playhouse & sand....him let us play on them"
A'jaye: well, she's a baby, and doesn't talk much, but as I've menitoned before, she's such a grandpa's girl, she always has a great time tearing up Grandpa's magazines, or clearing the cofeee table, grandpa's so good to just let her do her thing, it cleans up......

Some of Aaron and I's thoughts on Dad......
Aaron's dad is always willing to help us out when we need, it doesn't matter how big the task, or how small, we know we can always rely on him for help. The love he has for his grandkids is evident whenever they are around him. He showers them with hugs & attention & loves to visit with the older ones.
He wont admit it much, but he's sort of a big teady bear when it comes to those little ones & loves the slobber kisses, they give him.
He enjoys very much when we come to visit & stay for the night or weekend, it doesn't happen a lot just cause its so hard to travel with 4, soon to be 5 kids but you can tell he's just thrilled to have us around.
He's very proud of his family, his kids and grandkids. He supports all his kids, and grandkids in every thing they do. He loves to watch the grandkids have fun whether at his house or in any activity they might be involved in.

A story I remember about Keith is when he bought us all circus tickets & we all went as a family to the circus, all of us were there except for Jeremy, Chrissy's husband. All the grandkids were there though which was the most important part. We decided to ride the Tram downtown just so we wouldn't have to fight traffic or parking & it let us off right by the Delta Center. It was raining so hard that day, so here we all are running with kids in tote, bags, diapers, binkies, strollers the whole nine yards to thr tram. He was buying us all tickets to get on the train while we stood in line to get on. Well it took awhile for the tokens to be gotten, so Michael and I were holding the door for Dad so it wouldn't close and leave him there..... it kept yellling at us to get outta the doorway, loud, louder, VERY LOUD, lol....we all got on that tram, soaking wet and kids crying he barely made it on the train & he stayed so calm even with everyone just frustrated with being wet, kids crying.... I think we all looked like the circus ourselves. LOL!
We had a great time that day even though it was quite the event to get us all there, together, and kids happy. When we left our seats to leave, it looked like a bomb had gone off with spilt cherry slushi's, and popcorn, & candy all over the floor, sticky kids, and sleepy tired kids. then we decided to torture ourselves even more & go out to eat at a restraunt together, as if the circus wasn't enough. WE had a chance to sit at the table and just visit and laugh, and it was a great time being all together and doing something that was fun. The grandkids one by one went and gave hugs to papa and thanked him for the day at the circus. You could see the look of joy and love in Papa's eyes. It made him happy, I could tell to put a smile on their faces.

Aaron and appreciate you, Dad for your love and support. we hope you had a fabulous day on your birthday & we love you!

MY DAD!

2009-05-05T18:08:00.000-07:00

Well, it was his birthday on May 1st, but because I am a big old looser, I forgot I had a blog to pay tribute to him. If he wasn't such a great guy, I wouldn't even bother at this point, but HE IS!...so even though its late, I haveta share some thoughts about him.

So I asked my kids what they all liked about Grandpa Lloyd and this is their responses:

Derian.... "Grandpa pulled my tooth out, and it didn't even hurt....he's magic"

Ashlynn.... "I like to hug on Grandpa, but he has whiskers" (this especially made me laugh cuz great grandpa lloyd was FAMOUS for the same stunt)

Kymbree.. "(BIG GRIN, and a shy look) ..... I wuv papa Oyd"

A'jaye.... well, she speaks for herself when ever Grandpa comes to the door, she's the first to run to him, FAST....with her arms out to hold her. She LOVES her Grandpa, she is a total grandpa's girl.

and as for me.... this is what I haveta say about my Dad....

He's a quiet man, that doesn't say a whole lot, but you can always tell how he feels by the look in his eyes. His eyes speak volumes! I've always respected my dad for the person that he is, and the way he lives his life. He never judges a soul, and he always has a giving heart. So I guess he isn't so quiet after all because his actions are loud especially when it comes to his kids and family.

I haveta add a little story, that I always think of. When I had A'jaye he was there, and it was comforting to have my family there. My dad would sit in this chair in the room and look at me with these loving eyes, as if he wanted to take ALL the pain away but couldn't.... It came time for A'jaye to come into this world and everyone left the room. I remember after I had the baby he came in and sat in that same chair, and I could tell that he had been crying, or was visibly upset, it really touched me to the point of tears myself....afterwards I asked my mom what was wrong with dad, and she told me he was just so concerned and worried and overcome with fear.... it was a tuff delivery, but I think my dad carried most that burden for me that day, I might felt the pain, but that day my dad took the emotional burden for me! I honestly think that to this day, that is why A'jaye is so oooo emotionaly attatched to him.

Aaron was so touched by his words he spoke to us all at Thanksgiving dinner that it had him even choked up. He also always mentions the time that dad took him out on the porch (not a basement talk this time, lol) & expressed how much he appreciated him for the way he took care of me, and his kids. That he respected the person that Aaron is & saw him as a son and loved him. This meant so much to Aaron to hear that from his Father in law it really just meant the world to him. He explains dad as being a very quiet man, but when he speaks, you had better listen cause he means every word of it, and it always comes from the heart.

Dad, I hope you had a fabulous birthday. I know our family loves you beyond measure. Your quite the man and you will ALWAYS hold a special place in your daughters heart!

We love you......

Happy Birthday Ashlynn!!

2009-04-29T09:26:00.000-07:00

Our baby girl turns 8 today! I can't believe it. Before she went to bed last night she came in to talk with us and we both told her that we were going to wake her up at 1:30a.m and then keep her up from then on out sense that is what she did to us this day 8 yrs ago. I'll never forget her birth story, of course I dont think a mom ever forgets ANY of her childrens birth stories. We, as mother's remember every detail, every moment, but one thing we do forget about is the pain! (least I think we do forget cuz we just keep doing it, lol) Ashlynn was by far my easiest baby to have, although the day was full of labor pains and being uncomfortable she was the easiest when it came right down to the big event, and recovery was simple and fast!

She weighed in at 6lbs even, I remember looking at her face and she was so small and petite with these big brown eyes. She was so little, and such a small package of joy! I still can't believe that my mom's biggest fear that day was that I would go into labor sense it was my brother Chads mission farewell in church and we were all due to talk as a family. When I called her at 1:30 telling her we were heading to the hospital she just sighed..... I remember the nurse coming in with my dr and asking me if I wanted to stay at 6:30am or if I wanted to go home and labor and then just come back. I looked at the time, and said.... I'm going home, and going to church to talk for my brother's farewell. Aaron was like...UMMMM NO! but I came home, showered, got my girls ready and we made it, we were late, but we made it. I talked, and went thru all of church as well as the family dinner we did afterwards with contractions 5min or less apart.

I tease Ashlynn to this day that she just wanted to make sure that I got in all of my brother's farewell, and wasn't going to get me out of talking in church. I remember doing the talk for my brother & having pains all thru it, but we got thru it, and right after the dinner when Aaron took me back home I lied down for a few minutes, and stood up and my water broke right there on the living room floor. IT freaked Aaron out a little. .... & then HOLY CRAP I was in major pain. Daddy carried me out to the car...w/me screaming and moaning the whole way to Gunnison saying HURRY I'm going to die!!! It hurt so bad! It wasn't to much longer that she was placed in our arms, a perfect little brown eyed baby girl that we loved and still do forever and always. She's so special to us. She was such a good baby, and just so petite and little with her itty bitty pie face. She still has those petite features she just got older is all.

Things we love about our Ashlynn bug......

* Her big brown eyes!

* Even when she's angry she's so cute, especially when she grits her teeth and clinches her fists....

* She speaks her mind even if you dont like what she says

* She loves her little sisters, and is always so good to play with them when she gets home from school. She gets so happy to see A'jaye come running after her saying...."SISSY SISSY"

* She loves everyone, and is so tender hearted

* She loves to help mom in the kitchen, doing dishes, wiping down counters, and cooking

* She also loves to spend time with her dad doing "daddy guy" stuff. She loves to get dirty, and do yard work with him, she loves to help him fix things, and greasy hands, and worms on hooks, and cleaning the fish..... she is fascinated with motors, fancy tires, and old time classic vehicles. Aaron loves that!

* Even though she loves to get greasy, and loves doing the boy stuff with dad she also is very much a dress and skirt fancy shoes girl. She loves to have the girly things to wear and fingernails painted, and toes to match.....

Ashlynn is a joy to have in our home. She keeps life interesting, and she makes me a better mom and Aaron a better dad just cause she's honest and tells us what we are doing wrong, and tells us what she needs from us. She doesn't hold back her emotions, and that is something that I do appreciate about her. She does express herself very well, lol. Aaron says he is glad for that, she wont b afraid to put the boys in their places!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASHLYNN! You'll always be our brown eyed baby girl forever! Your turning into a beautiful young lady and we love the person you are becoming each year. You make us so proud. You know sweetie, your almost at your age cap.... daddy has put an age cap on all of you girls and that age is 10 so you only get 2 more birthdays and thats it, lol..... Daddy says NO girls past 10. haha. Love ya baby girl!

FOR AUNT AMANDA............WE LOVE YOU!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY

2009-04-26T16:51:00.000-07:00

Well sense its Amanda's birthday and she's always doing nice blogs up for everyone else I thought the girls and I would take a moment and do the same thing (only not as cute as her's I'm sure) for her..... She deserves it! We love her.....

We love (Auntee) Amanda bcuz..........

* She's super fun when we stay at her house, & plays with us for a long time......

* She's super cool, & knows how to rock out to the hippest songs that we like.....

* She's always so loving to us when she see's us, we always get a BIG HELLO, and hug from her!

* She gave us our bestest sweetest cutest baby cousin, Paislee that we love so much!!!

K...now a grown up version of the best things about Amanda.....

* She is very loving to all the family and you can tell that she cares deeply for everyone.......

* She's an awesome wife to our brother Chad, whom I am sure takes a lot of patience to live with (smile).... jk, Chad, but Amanda is a great, loving, best friend to you and we love her for that cuz we know she makes your world complete and happy!

* She really is a great mom to Paislee, and when I say REALLY a great mom, I really mean it! She should have lots of kids!!!

* She loves to help out anyone she can, especially family, and I have felt her love many times in her giving ways, and you really feel that she wants to help and be there for you!

* She's so easy to talk to, and hang out with

* The girl knows how to have a good time! She's funny, and social, and smiles alot, and I love that she loves to be involved with things, and help out, and be a part of any thing we do......

* She loves family things, and wants to bring the family together, which I think is very awesome of her!!!

* Most of all, I just love the person she is inside and out. I think she is a beautiful person, that has the most genuine spirit a person could have. Her love for her family radiants from her, and that makes her even more beautiful!

WE LOVE YOU AMANDA!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

We hope you have a special day!

30 wks.... & problems!

2009-04-08T13:18:00.000-07:00

Goodness me..... here we are at 30wks and counting. I have 10-11wks left at least thats what we hope for!
Its been an eventful week that has brought worry, stress & action. Monday I started having what I thought were just braxton hicks contractions. They progressed thru the evening and got to be somewhat uncomfortable and a bit stronger and frequent then I felt comfortable with. They continued thru the night and into Tuesday a little. I decided to put a call into the Dr, which I hate doing because you just feel like your jumping the gun & freaking out over nothing but I just had a feeling that calling the dr was the right thing to do.
He told me to continue thru the night, but to go into the ER if I was having them like the night before, and if not he'd see me this morning. Well, we made it thru the night, and I took my appointment this morning as planned. I had just a few contractions this morning, but nothing like I was experiencing the night and day before. He checked me out and unfortunately, I wasn't just having braxton hicks contractions but the real thing & it had progressed me to a 1 cm. Now, I realize that its just a one, and there's several more cm to go before you give birth, but I'm only 30wks so that isn't exactly what my dr would like to see. we also got an ultrasound just to check the position of the baby, the size and the placenta to make sure the baby was getting sufficient blood, nutrients & oxgyn which baby looked great. The heartbeat was strong, and normal and activity was still really good. We did discover that the baby is now head down which is a good thing, but at 30 wks that could change again too.
Dr. Dewey sent me home with instructions to take it easy as possible & to keep track of my contractions. If we go over 5 in a hours time, no matter how consistent they are I have to go into the ER, however if we don't exceed 5 in a hours time but are still having them he wants to see me in a couple days to be checked again to make sure its not progressing me any further. If it does progress me past the 1 cm then I will start medication and full bed rest to get it all to stop. If we get to a 2 cm & its looken like we're going further he will start giving the baby steroid shots to help with baby's lung development in case the baby does come earlier then 39wks.
He'd like to see me get at least to 35wks, which is 5 more weeks.
I am relatively calm about this although I do realize the seriousness of it all. I guess I am trying not to freak out over it because stress and anxiety will NOT help my cause. I figure all I can do is do my part to take it easy and follow the direction of the Dr & put it in Gods hands that everything will be ok either way. As long as my baby is ok in there, and its not effecting my little peanut then I can do whatever I'm asked to do on my end to keep the baby in good condition as well as myself. I also believe that the mind is a powerful thing, and I have to stay positive one way or the other. Thinking negative thoughts about it all the time isn't going to help, but only hurt so I'm trying to just keep upbeat and focused.
Aaron is being wonderful and doing his part to help out and take over, my older two girls came home from school today & took over all the house duties as well as helping me out with the younger two. My mom is on stand by to come at a moments notice if I need her, which is a HUGE comfort to me.....its all a comfort to me. The support of family is always so appreciated!
Of course I am worried about it all, however, I really do have a calm approach to this, and I feel good that everything will be ok in the end. In fact, it will just be my luck that we will struggle with stopping delivery to 35 wks, and then when the dr gives the lift on stopping it, my body will put a stop to it & I'll go over again like I always do, lol. NAH, I dont think so this time..... I think we'll b blessed to get another month out of this pregnancy....so we'll hope for that, and strive for that! Dr. Dewey couldn't pinpoint any one reason as to why this is happening other then just the effects on a body after having 5 kids, 3 of which are all very close..... apparently it's not very good to the bod!
This picture is Kymbree giving the baby a love when I got back this morning....she said to me " momma, baby wants out, & I want baby out" I told her that baby had to stay in there for at least another month...and she gave me the ole sigh........ She's overly excited to see baby, and help me with baby, which I think is so cute!

Our puppy, is now a Lady dog..... lol

2009-04-07T11:42:00.000-07:00

WELL WELL WELL.... our little girl, has now become a young lady dog! Zoey's in HEAT! HOW FUN for me...... & what awesome timing! Right at the start of spring, and warm weather, and when the kids want to b outside, and so does she!!!! We new it was going to happen soon, but I guess I was secretly hoping it wouldn't happen till after baby came, or something. I know we have that choice to NOT let her come in contact w/another male dog & we dont plan to this time around, but its such a pain in teh butt! My life is already full of things to watch, and look after, and keep out of trouble so this is just another MAJOR thing to deal with. We DO NOT want her becoming mommy zoey with another male boxer, let alone another male neighborhood dog. Thank goodness for us their isn't a whole lotta "in tack" male dogs around but like Aaron said, let her out & just see how many dogs come around.....apparantly dogs have a "scent" for another female in heat...O JOY! We defiantly want her to have puppies & are excited for that time to come but NOT NOW! not anytime in the next yr! We figure we'll let her next spring....can we hold her back, I SURE HOPE SO! lol
She really is a great dog, & she loves us so much. Its so funny that she thinks she's really one of the kids. This picture is her looking out the window down at the kids playen on the trampoline. She was sooo hurt that she wasn't invited. Her most favorite thing is when the girls get home from school because she knows they'll be going outside to jump & YES she does jump with them! Its hilarious! I dont think any of us realize just how BIG she is really. When she stood up to look out the window this day, I really realized just how HUGE she is...... There's only a couple things we need to work on for her to be the perfect pet dog......
* CHEWING up everything! (I have to remember she's just a puppy still....)
* Getting to excited when new ppl come to the house, & she wants to jump on them, or run out the door to say hello to them....
* being polite when ppl are here.....
* & getting anxiety when we leash her up. SHe can't stand not being apart of our family, so chaining her up outside hurts her feelings I guess, lol....makes me nuts!

OVerall....we love her, & these are minor things that she will get better with time on. She's a yr old this month, I can't believe that we've had her for almost a yr in June. She really has become apart of our family, and we just adore her. COngrats Zoey, your a big girl now! haha...(u just can't act on your nature just yet, sorry)

SPRING HAS COME & I LOVE IT!

2009-04-07T11:16:00.000-07:00

Another wk has past, so I decided to do a blog entry. I dont really have alot of pics to share, or even huge family events so I included this pic I took a couple wks ago at our first trip to the park. One good thing, there's NO MORE snow visible in the vally's due to the recent warm up! I LOVE SPRING! Its by far my most favorite season. Here's why....
* the sound of the birds chirping...
*the smell of rain, fresh flowers, & fresh cut grass I LOVE
* butterflies & hummingbirds make themselves present
* Fresh air, and walks outside!
* THE KIDS CAN PLAY OUTSIDE! no more cooped up kiddo's!
* & last but not least...there's something about spring that makes me wanna open up the windows, turn on the radio, & clean out everything! SPRING CLEANING!

I took the two babies on our first picnic at the park yesterday. It was so fun for the kids to go play, and b outside in the warm, fresh air. It makes a huge difference in their attitudes. I think having some sun out, and some warm weather uplifts everyone's mood. Its not so cold, dark and dreary! I know it helps my mood too. I invited one of my friends & her 2 1/2 yr old son to go too, it was so cute to see Kymbree & him run towards each other & say HI... and give each other a huge hug and kiss, lol. SO FUNNY! We were there for 2.5hrs it just felt so nice to be out! Later that night, however I noticed that even a "not so" bright sun can give you your first sunburn. Myself & A'jaye caught some sun on our arms and face, but it was sooo worth it! I LOVE SPRING!
I guess I'll update you all on my pregnancy while I'm at it.... we're now nearing 30wks. I can't believe it, that leaves me about 10-11wks left! I already posted the picture of our ultrasound. I catch myself looking at it almost everyday.... Its really wierd for me to look at my girls all together, or see them all in a picture because I do feel like their is a baby missing & I catch myself trying to search down this missing baby so its validation, I suppose that this baby is defiantly apart of our family, and was always meant to be apart of our clan. Why he/she would want to be, is beyond me because we're sorta crazy, and not the most together group, but we do love each other all very much, and we do try to have a great family.....its a work in progress though. Aaron and I love our children so much, and each of them bring such a different presents to our family, its like they all hold a piece to the puzzle, called "our family" & w/out each piece it just can't be complete. They all have strong spirits that we, as their parents, need in our lives. These girls help us & teach us to be better, stronger people when I thought it was always supposed to be the opposite in that we teach them to be stronger and better people, little people that is.... but it is clearly the other way. I guess in some way, we all help each other be better people and that is what a family is about!

Here's our little peanut....

2009-03-30T15:45:00.000-07:00

Here's our little peanut. I was hoping I'd get the 3D ultrasound but we didn't get it obviously. This is, if you can't tell, the side profile & he has his little hands in a fist. well I say HE, but honestly I dont know, and I didn't let the dr tell me. He kept teasing me, but its still a suprise baby. Now, I'm so excited to see this little thing, and hold him/her. The baby is breech right now, so we're hoping that it starts to turn although it has plenty of time yet, but running outta room so it needs to turn! We will ck at the next 2 visits. My placenta has corrected itself, and has gone to the top which is a good thing, I dont know how I woulda done full bed rest for the next 3mo! Luckily we dont have to!
My due date has been pinpointed to June 28th going off the measurements, but he said that it could go 10days in either direction, being June 15 or July 5th. Maybe born on Grandma Lloyds bday! I dont wanna go that long though...I'm ready NOW!
Today's appt just made me so excited to get this baby here, and meet this little person. Kymbree went with and stood on the bench and watched intently the ultrasound monitor. I was suprised she made out the babies profile, but she said...."O MY GOSH momma, deres baby bruder" Then she told Dr Dewey..."my momma has a baby in her belly, and its going b borned in dere, dats my baby bruder" It was sorta adorable! A'jaye went too, but she could care less.... she doesn't have a clue whats about to happen, lol.
Anyhow....things look good otherwise, and everything is in order.....well, everything is in order with babies development that is, outside the womb, nothing is ready but time will fix that! Time fixes everything, right?

growing belly.......

2009-03-24T13:14:00.000-07:00

Well here it is, our baby at 26.5 wks along. This baby is a mover & a shaker! A very active little thing..... I'm so excited to be able to see this baby for a full ultra sound on Monday. I believe we'll be getting a 3D ultra sound too, which will be awesome even though I find those things to be a little freaky! I already feel such a connection, even moreso I think then my other babies at this point, with this baby & already have begun bonding with him/her. I can't wait to meet this little thing & see what baby looks like, who will he/she resemble the most? Funny thing is I'm more excited to see what baby looks like, then to know the sex of the baby. I have to say that I would HIGHLY suggest waiting to find out to everyone that will still be having babies. Its been SO FUN not knowing. It sorta adds to the excitment of the entire process, & actually helps you get thru each month even more. Its sorta like a present that you can't wait to open up. The girls refer to baby as "baby brother" , but I refer to baby as "suprise baby" for more then one reason, lol. Either way we just feel SO blessed to be having this baby, and with each day that passes I feel even stronger that this baby has a purpose to our family, and has such a strong spirit. I feel this baby all around me everyday & I can't wait for the day that I get to hold her/him.
I sorta feel bad for husbands, they miss out on this special experience of having baby in the womb. There are times I wish Aaron could take the load of carrying baby, but I'd NEVER want to give this part up for anything. ITs funny how as a women we love and hate being pregnant. There are parts I'd give up rignt now forever, but feeling baby move, hiccup, being a part of me is the most special gift God has given us as women. How amazing that our bodies build another life....its just absolutely amazing to me. I always tell my girls that their belly buttons are their tie to me, they think that is just the neatest thing, & sorta it is!
Well we have just under 3mo till baby comes..... & I'm trying to just enjoy every moment of it as ready as I am to be done with this stage of my life, it also makes me sad that this is the final one & I will NO longer experience carrying a baby again, but I've had my share its time I hang up this card & continue wtih the "raising kids" card till we're done with that one & then I'm sure we'll be sad about that ending too, its sort of a bitter sweet thing with each journey ending I guess.

Just cuz it made me giggle!

2009-03-11T20:51:00.000-07:00

HAHA! I was goin thru my pictures & come across this one of mom and dad, and it cracks me up!
It made me laugh so hard I couldn't stop. YEP this is our parents Lloyd children, WE ARE PROUD! lol. I do love you guys so much! I am so blessed with amazing, fantastic, loving parents. I often find myself missing so much being around you & being able to go over to your house and hang out on a whim. Kymbree says everyday almost that she wants to go see Grandma Aphween, cuz she has new purple shoes and she has to show her ( I have NO idea why she feels the need to show Grammie her new shoes, but she does) .
I just am so grateful for both of you, you've both given me so much in life I wont ever b able to repay you for! As I look at my children growing it always makes me laugh because I find myself doing and saying things you guys always did growing up. There's a piece of you in each of my girls and just look at what you two created..... u have pages and pages of blogs full of grandkids, grown kids, and family to show for your life together! What an awesome story you both have created.... WE LOVE YOU!!!

Time's growing closer.... & mom's in a panic

2009-03-10T13:19:00.000-07:00

Well here we are beginning March, right? The months have gone so fast it'll b June b4 I know it! Here I am my belly growing daily, my baby moving more frequently & the reality of this situation sets in. Questions arise that I'm not ready to answer. Where u going to deliver? What u going to name the baby? What u taken to the hospital for the baby to come home in? When are you going to buy a carseat? What if its a boy and it has to use a pink blanket? Names Names Names??

I'll just say it for the record, I DONT KNOW! I DONT KNOW, I DONT KNOW! I havent really thought of any of this because its not really happening right? Its just a dream, its not really reality, lol. I mean obviously I realize that my stomach is huge, and I can't shave my legs anymore, but am I really having #5? All I can say to that is, 5 is ALOT of kids! Actually 5 isn't a whole lotta kids, but the way I've done it, IT IS alot of kids.

I just really have to give a shout out to my older two girls. WIthout them two I'd be lost, I'd loose my mind. They really help me so much, their both little mothers to Kymbree & A'jaye. Derian takes most the burden on Kymbree when she gets home. She helps me by playing with her, & helps me put her to bed & takes ALOT in cleaning up the messes she makes. THANK YOU SWEETY! She is a awesome babysitter, & its so nice to b able to go to the store and not have to take everyone with, or to go out on a date w/my husband & know that things are fine. We still get alot of phone calls but its still so nice to take a hour or two and go to dinner.

My sweet Ashlynn.... she is the best big sister to A'jaye. Ashlynn comes thru the door from school and A'jaye lights up, and runs after her to give her hugs & smacks (kisses, AJ calls them "macks") Ashlynn is so sweet with her & honestly I truly mean this from the bottom of my heart, I would NEVER b able to do this w/out my 2 older ones!!! Like Aaron told them the other night, "yea sometimes it sux being the older ones u have alot more responsibility in helping out" Derian & Ash both just smiled and Derian said.."Yea but mom owes me $45.00 in babysitting fee's so its ok" lol. I do pay her....lol. I figure i have to pay someone I may as well pay my daughter.

SO we have like 3mo left of pregnancy & although I'm catching up to reality & its smacking me hard I am so excited to meet this baby & find out what it is. I have such mixed feelings on is it a boy or is it a girl but really Aaron and I are hoping for a healthy baby and healthy delivery more then anything. Kymbree insists its a brother baby she says "it not a gurl, its a boy one" w/her finger pointed at everyone. She talks to the baby at night b4 bed, its hilarious. She'll say "boy baby you in dere, you ok, its ok sistor is here" lol. Its so cute! All my dreams tell me its a boy, but time will tell it is already what it is & that isn't changing. I promised myself I wouldn't buy anything boy or girl, but I was in Walmart the other night and they had little newborn baby jammies for $3 & I couldn't resist. I figured I could take em back, or give em away.

I know there's really no purpose to this blog posting, but I really just wanted to thank my older two baby girls for helping me so much, they really do alot and I'm forever grateful for them! I LOVE YOU BOTH!

KYMBREE KATHLEEN POULSON!!!! Get your BUTT in here!

2009-03-09T13:53:00.000-07:00

Oh my goodness, I return to business as usual, lol. On Saturday night while I was talking to Aaron and hanging out in the bedroom watching TV the girl were all in the living room doing thir thing. Derian comes in and says, "mom, I think Kymbree just cut A'jayes ponytail off" WHAT!!!!

A'jaye had a cute little ponytail on the top of her head Saturday (sense thats all we can really do with her hair) and Kymbree got ahold of scissors and she snipped it right off at the base, GReAT!!!!

Well needless to say, it doesn't look very cute! I told A'jaye, its a dang good thing she's little and adorable otherwise we'd have an issue. I guess its just hair, and it grows back, but DANG! Kymbree is such a little stinker butt sometimes. Our household can NOT live with out that cute little girl though, even as mad as she makes us sometimes!

Here's the after math......

Mom leaves on an exclusive NO kids overnighter!

2009-03-09T13:37:00.000-07:00

Well, my BFF (haha) talked me into going on an overnighter trip w/her & her sister. Her sister works up at Sundance just up Provo Canyon and was able to get us a cabin unit for free. We took her up on the deal and left friday night to go away for 24hrs. I think I needed this more then I thought. I had so much fun w/these two, of course I always do.

I always get anxiety whenever I leave & go overboard on getting Aaron and the kids ready, as if they can't make it a night without me there, DUH! I get there clothes all ready for the next day, and I have food all ready...and just stupid stuff that Aaron is MORE then capable of doing himself. We usually have a dozen phone calls while I'm gone between one another just because #1. we hate to b apart, or #2 they can't find something, or need something or whatever...

Well, Teneile had a plan, and it worked a little, lol. Up to Sundance there is NOT alot of cell service so it was hit and miss on the phone calls, but it turned out to be ok. I got over my anxiety issue and sorta relaxed, I had a great time. It was nice to get away.

We went to dinner at our fav place Tapenyaki's after waiting for a hour to get down the canyon because of a slide off in front of us, but other then that thigns were good, we made the best of it. WE came back to the cabin with 3 grocery sacks of JUNK/COMFORT foods, and roasted marshmellows over the fire, and had girl talk. We stayed up till 3am and just enjoyed our every moment we had away from normal life.
I was so happy to learn that Aaron had a huge sleepover himself with his daughters. They all slept in our bed friday night with him and Derian and him stayed up and watched the Jazz game together fri night. Saturday morning they all got up and he took them to breakfast at our fav place over in Spanish fork, and then he took them to walmart just to roam around and shop for fun things. If u all know Aaron, he just DOES NOT roam walmart! He's your typical guy shopper, goes in with a plan and comes out just as fast as he went in, but he was there for almost 2hours just letten the girls look around and window shop for things. They had so much fun with their daddy! I told Aaron....Gosh, I guess I should maybe do this more often, then you can all have bonding time, and I get a break! He just looked at me with the look.

Aaron's a great daddy, of course I've always thought this, but this weekend just proved it to me once again. He really gives them qualitity time, which means so much to them and to me!
I am so glad I went, it was nice, to ahve a small break away from reality and take a breather. I think every mom/women needs to do this once in awhile!

A'jaye gets in trouble!!! & the dog scores big!

2009-03-09T13:25:00.001-07:00

So, I have some pics, and some stories to go along with it. Bare with me again, there's going to be like 3-4 NEW postings.... but again, I dont know how to post the pics w/the stories and do it all in one blog, so if someone can teach me, I'll do it that way rather then this way, but for now this works.

So, the other day, Kymbree comes running in the bedroom where I was putting away clothes & says...."MOM, JJ's is on the ounter, & deres omen noobles ebery aire" (baby talk, hope you can translate). MAN I say and go running in the kitchen. IF I forget to put the stools up on the table or up on the counter A'jaye we EVERy time climb up on the kitchen counter and play in my sugar bowl, or flour canister, or something. Usually making a mess EVERYWHERE! I usually hear here though, but this time she was a silent mess maker. I walk in and this is what I found.....

Ramen noodles everywhere that we had just had for lunch, her on the counter looken at me like..."WHAT, I didn't do anything, besides if I did, I'm cute so...like you'll get mad at me mom" and she says to me "MOMMA" and puts her hands out. I called in Zoey and she cleaned it up for me, she was all bothered by having to be the vacumn cleaner though...I'm sure she just hates situations such as this! lol. SO, here's my pics from our little mess maker, and our cleaner upper!

Tope 5 Pet Peeves......

2009-02-26T09:20:00.000-08:00

Along time ago I was tagged with my Pet peeves....sorta like a top 10 fav's but pet peeves instead. I forgot all about that tag, till I seen a few postings done on it yesterday and remembered. I know I have more then 5 pet peeves, lol....but its much funner to think about your favorite things then your pet peeves, right? However, I'll try and play along with pet peeves....but geez, just to list 5??? I have way more then 5! Here goes.....

#1. CHOMPING, SLURPING, wierd mouth noises, figiting! Chopping & mouth noises especially while eating has ALWAYS bugged me. Then you get kids and you go thru the whole teaching them not to do it, cuz EVERY kid does it when thier learning. Now, I notice my kids telling their friends or each other at times to STOP making gross noises while they eat. When I was doing daycare alot, you get the kids a drink of water, and they'd GULP it, OMG...can we say BUG ME TO DEATH...its like nails on a chalkboard to me! I'd have to leave the room! This is a HUGE thing for me.

#2. CLUTTER! (Aaron is going to laugh when he see's this one) U know things can bug me, but at the same time and I can be guilty of them too! so there! I dont claim to be "clutter free" EVER! HELLO...I have 4, soon to b 5 kids we have clutter! However, it BUGS ME, it makes me CRaZy, InSaNE, makes me feel outta control ( I guess this would b why I feel outta control all the time). I do hate clutter. Clean to me is clutter free....no piles of crap everywhere, nothing outta its "home", nothing stacked to the ceiling..... I HATE CLUTTER its a huge pet peeve of mine even though I'm terribly guilty of it. I feel like I'm constantly dejunking my house, and de-cluttering. One day I'll get there, I SWEAR! Sometimes we are our own worst enemy, you know, but at least I can admit it too!

#3. JUDGEMENTAL ppl! Enough said about that..... It's easy to look at someone & make a judgement call. I know I used to be REALLY bad about this, but over time, and growing up & my husband showing me a better way I've learned that u can't judge someone based on ANYTHING. Until you've walked a day in their life, their minds then DONT judge them. Yes, there are obvious things that make you form a strong opinion...but at the same time we must have compassion, and understanding for everyone. It doesn't mean you have to like them, agree with them, or have anything to do w/them. Anytime I see someone, or hear of someone that has made a mistake, or has had something happen to them even at the fate of their "not so smart" decision making, it makes me feel badly, and makes me wonder what has gone on in their life that has caused them to make such horrible decisions. I'm guilty of judging, I think everyone is....no one is perfect but there is ALWAYS a reason behind ppl's bad decisions, wrong choices, & bad paths taken. It realy just makes me sad for them more then anything. I've made mistakes in my life so I've been on the being judged end of the stick plenty of times in my life & I'm very grateful for those times in my life cuz it did make me realize that judging someone is never a wise thing to do, u just don't know everything about everyone or why or what so leave them alone and be compassionate! U know, some of the BEST people I know have lived a rough life, made hard decisions, took wrong paths but looking at the "core" of who they are is much more empowering then looking at the surface of someone.

#4. HINTING around that you need or want something. JUST ASK! I get that sometimes your just feeling out a person, seeing if they might be interested (GUILTY) but at the same time if I really need something I'm not going to hint around about it hoping the other person will take the bate, I'll ASK....so should u! Like if you want a drink of water, & u know someone is going to the kitchen anyhow...instead of saying..."gosh, I really would like a glass of water, but man I dont wanna get up" THAT BUGS ME so bad, I will not bring u a glass of water just to spite you, lol. I'd prefer rather u just ask, lol.... some of the small things in life u dont need to feel around & see if someone is willing to do it for you! ASK!

#5 FAKINESS! I HATE fake ppl! Seriously I can see right thru u! I am not going to say that I havent ever done the "OH HOW ARE U, GOSH...IT SOOOO GOOD TO SEE U" thing either, but honeslty I dont take it further then that. Most the time I am glad to see them, but not happy so much to talk to them for long, lol. U know what, if you honeslty dont like someone be cordial but dont play it up all fake like! Its so funny to watch almost, but sometimes its just plane painful to watch. I get somewhat embarressed for ppl like that. If you dont like someone then why try so hard to seem likr u do, haha! I wont elaborate on this one any longer...I could get myself in trouble!

Gosh, I guess it has proven sorta difficult to come up with pet peeves, when you really think of it. It's taken me all day to come up with those 5..... I know things bug me, but I guess I dont spend all my time focusing in on them. The ones I listed are MAJOR buggers for me....and the silly thing is I'm guilty of doing them some times. (NOT CHOMPING though ....& not taking the "fake" thing to far! uh uh! WONT DO IT!) No one is perfect, we're all working towards that, right? SO I guess we just remember that ppl are ppl, & if we were all the same then think how boring life would really be? & what would we have to talk about? lol

TOP 10 things I CAN'T live without.......

2009-02-26T08:14:00.000-08:00

I've noticed everyone in my family is doing the TOP 10 list....so I thought I'd play along too, what the hek......

TOP 10 FAVORITE THINGS...(or can't live withouts)

#10. Frozen Coke preferrably a Slurpee, but I also love the SLushi Pepsi

#9. The internet.... its my daily habit to jump online ck out blogs, ck out facebook messages, write on in my journal that I keep tucked away on my computer & pay bills, ck accts & do my emails....OH and I also love to scope out new recipe's on allrecipe.com

#8. My cell phone! nothing to explain there, I always have my cell phone with me, or by me, and if I dont have it, I feel lost! what the hek did we do b4 cell phones!!!

#7 Text messaging..... I know this goes along with cell phone but honeslty, if I didn't have that feature, or if it wasn't invented I'd also be one lost women! I LOVE texting....sometimes I prefer it to talking, u just cut to the chase, no small talk! haha

#6. Lifesaver Orange flavored mints! I LOVE these things....I buy them in huge bundles when their on sale for $1.00 then I open the bag, and go thru all the bags trying to find the "soft brittle" ones cuz they melt in your mouth and its YUMMY

#5. Coupons & clearance.....I LOVE good deals, I love being able to get a grocery cart full of groceries, then going to the ck out where it reads $60.00 & walking out there after coupons, and promotions & spending $25.00 or less its the best feeling!

#4. My friends.....I have some wonderful friends, (my mom being at the top of that friend list). They are all so sweet, supportive, and can read me almost as good as my mother!...I can be down, depressed, in the dumps & they all know that something isn't right with me w/out me saying anything. I always get a call saying..."Hey, u wanna go get a drink, and talk" I love the girlfriends that I have!

#3. My family. By this I mean my side and Aarons side. OUr parents, siblings, nieces, nephews & grandparents. We are both blessed with wonderful, suppportive & loving families. Somedays its so hard not being close by to them & being able to see them at the drop of the hat, but other days its nice to be away too, lol. Any of our family members would drop anything to help us out & have done this many times. Its sucha comfort to us & one that we sometimes take for granited. I can't imagen not having such strong family ties, and having that close connection like we do. Its defiantly something I can't live w/out in my life.

#2 MY KIDS! My sweet girls, what would I do with out them in my life. Thinking about this, takes me back to the time I sat in Aaron's arms crying because I feared the worst thing, not being able to have kids. I had so many "girl" issues that having babies wasn't going to prove an easy task. The day I found out I was pregnant w/Derian was the best day of my life! Then she was born & it was even better I finally felt complete. Then being told I wouldn't b having kids w/out the dr's help again, I just felt so lucky to have one..... then God continued to bless us w/no help from any dr's! There's days that I feel I'm going ot loose my mind but then I remember how these kids weren't suppose to happen yet we've been blessed time and time again with the sweetest spirits God could send us. We are indeed better people because of them. they each bring to our family a special quality. I LOVE my girls, & my life is complete! (well almost....as soon as #5 gets here I will DEFIANTLY be complete, lol)

#1. MY HUSBAND, my best friend! Everyday that goes by I realize more and more wonderful qualitities that my husband has. I fall deeper in love with him each day that goes by. I loved the boy I married nearly 14yrs ago, he cared, he loved me, he had goals for us, he took care of me and now that boy is a man that I respect, love & am so incredibly proud of him and who he has become. He is sucha hard worker & cares deeply for the important things in his life. The way he fathers our daughters makes my heart melt. His love for me and his girls shows in his eyes each time he see us. I defiantly CANT live with out him!

Just one more thing... I will call it #0 out of all these things in my life there's one that tops them, or rather then "topping" them all he plays a HUGE role in all the favorite things I have in my life....to my family, my kids, and my husband to my cellphone, internet, and lifesavers. I wouldn't call him "MORE important" then all of these things, but rather..... a guiding hand, a support system, the reason all these things in my life are apart of my life, and that is God. the church has said...God first, then husband, then children. God has ALWAYS been an important person in my life, I dont like to call him more important or first to my husband or children, because I see him as more of an equal partner in my life. I have made a point to pray everyday, & its a comfort to me to have that in my life, because I have a STRONG testimony of the power of prayer & God has always been apart of everything in my life. I'm so grateful for this guiding hand .... I mean, look at all he has blessed me with! I may not go to church every sunday, or be the most "religious" of ppl, but I am and consider myself to be very spiritual & thats one thing I try to instill in my girls, the power of prayer, and having God as a equal partner in your life. ITS A MUST in my book!

DIAPER HEADS!!!

2009-02-25T09:56:00.000-08:00

HAHA! This was a random but funny thing that went on last night. We laughed and laughed, so I thought I'd share even though I said that was it for postings, this just had to b shared!

Around 5pm EVERY day Kymbree gets wild n crazy. I dont know what it is about this time of day but she just gets over stimulated, and hyper. I think what it is, is she is soooo tired that she just goes the other way fighting to stay awake. WEll, she either makes us completely crazy or she makes us laugh, or both sometimes. The older two girls were trying hard to get their house chores done before dad got home at the end of the day, and I was trying desperately to get dinner done and with all the chaoes you can imagen my mood! It gets rather loud in here around 5-6pm.....sorta reminds me of when Uncle Kevin comes to visit, lol. LOUD! So Derian had the living room and she was cleaning away while Kymbree kept pestering here as she does. She was hitting here with a diaper and then taking off running so that Derian would get mad and chase her away. It was totally a game to her that she thought was fun, but Derian didn't think it was funny at all. Sense older sissy was doing it, A'jaye had to get in on it too....it made for a really loud evening. The older two girls were mad, and frustrated, and I was on the brink of loosing my mind. Then it got quiet for a minute, we went on doing our thing, but in the back ofmy mind I was thinking..mmmm, where are those younger ones, and why is it quiet. Then, around the corner here they come.....with their get up on, and ready to fight..... Kymbree had made diaper defense for their heads....lol. We laughed so hard we nearly wet ourselves. We had to bust out the camera and take photo's of these two and their armor! ITS DIAPER HEADS!!! What was once a frustrating, noisey house turned out to be a funny thing...and we learned to just laugh. Thats what Kymbree does....she's sucha pest sometimes that she's hilarious and she defiantly keeps our house on our toes either laughing or bieng mad! This of course made us laugh!

Just some random things from the last few wks....

2009-02-25T09:27:00.000-08:00

Ok, blogging hasn't been as often for our family. We havent had a whole lot going on, and things have been busy at our house just with kids, and babies, and trying to clean and organize my house. I also wanted to wait until I had some things to post about as well as some pics to post along with them.

Aaron went on a snowmobile trip with some friends of his last wkend. They went up to a cabin on Bear Lake. I was extremely worried about the avalanche warnings but knowing my husband the way I do, he is really getting anal in his older age, lol...about being safe. He's lost his "daring" side. Although he loves a good rush anyday, he has scaled down what he's willing to do to get it so although I worried, I really didn't worry that much. I new that he would do what he could b safe. They had fun despite a few set backs, but overall...the ride was beautiful, and the area was awesome he said. They just had a good time, but was so worn out at the end of each day and very sore from riding. He got home sunday night and we were all anxious to see him. I hate when he's gone, we all missed him. I was glad however that he got the chance to go, he enjoys the riding and the comondtry of his friends. With all this estrogen around this place he needs a chance to beat his chest and be a guy, lol

While he was gone, the girls and I really enjoyed each other. I suprised the older two girls with a night out like we used to do before the babies came along. They always mention how we used to go out and have what I called a girls day. We'd go to lunch and window shop....and just do girl things they miss it and so do I. We got up saturday cleaned the house and worked hard doing so, and then I told them to go get dolled up we were going out. I had a babysitter for the babies, and we left at 3pm. I took them to a salon where we fixed their hair and Derian got a hair cut. Then we went out to eat lunch/diner at their favorite place Tucano's and we had so much fun laughing and talking together over dinner. Then we stopped and got icecream to eat at home with Kymbree and A'jaye. I just have to say....this was the best thing I've done in a while with my older two. They needed that so much, but not as much as I did. I forgot how much I enjoyed that time with them and we just haven't been able to do that. We talked about everything from boys, to clothes, to friends, & problems at school, and what they wanted to be when they got older it ws just awesome. I need to do that more often. My older two girls are amazing kids, and good kids too. They help me out so much and I rely on them alot for the help they deserve to have a special time with mom from time to time. WE got home ate ice cream and had a sleep over in mom's bed that night. It was a lonely wkend with Aaron gone, but at the same time a enjoyable one cuz I spent qualitity time with my girls!

Monday I took Kym and A'jaye to the park. THe weather was a bit cold for going but they wanted to go so badly that I couldn't resists taking them. We had fun the short time we were there, and I snapped a few pics just because they were dressed up so cute.

Thats about it...for us the last few wks. I guess for not having to much going on there actually was some important, and special things that went on, things we will remember forever....sorry for all the new posts to catch up, but to post them all in one posting would really make my posting long.... & I havent yet figured out how to post the pics in diff spots, so they all end up at the top or soemting retarded. So, until next posting, take care!

Still catching up..... Our Sledding trips

2009-02-25T09:09:00.000-08:00

I realize there is a lot of posts to read, but I havent blogged in awhile, so you all know that I'm long winded, and YES I have a complex now due to Trisha teasing me so badly about it. There for awhile I was watching my emails, postings, comments, but now I dont care.....tease away. I just have a lot to say, so DEAL WITH IT! haha

So we have found THE perfect sledding spot for our kids. We've been a few times already, and we may go one more time b4 the season is up. Which I'm afraid will b soon the way the weather hs been. SOme old friends of Aaron's has some private property up Spanish Fork Canyon and it has a nice huge flat, with fun jumps for the snowmobiles, as well as huge hills and small hills for sledding. we have to ride the snowmobiles in to the spot, but it makes for fun day. We build a fire, and take a lunch, the kids really enjoy it. We usually go with several others to make it even funner. Everyone that goes with us only have boys, so its a bunch of men, and young boys and then ALL our girls, and I tell ya.....our older two girls can out due any of those boys, in adventure, and being brave anyday!

Der and Ash can't be related to me, cuz I am a chicken, hate a good rush, dont like to go fast, or feel outta control, but them two let it all go, and fear doesn't overtake them. This can be a good thing, but also it scared their mother to death. Aaron is worse then my mother when it comes to safety and worrying about being safe so he was a ball of nerves, and I just let him worry about it cuz he is worse about it then I. He stood at the bottom of the hill all day despite his back hurting making sure that the wouldn't run into the fence at the bottom of the hill. Your talking a HUGE steep hill...so they catch some speed, Aaron had to tackle Ashlynn a few times just to stop her. They were both sore at the end of the day. Derian LOVES to get a rush riding the snowmobile with daddy. She loves to go fast, and insists upon it, and jumps are a must, the higher and the faster the better she screams with excitement. The girls are way to brave! Because Kymbree hates the loud sounds of the snowmobile she wouldnt get out there and have fun, so I sat with the babies by the fire the first time, and I enjoyed watching SOME of what they did, but coudln't watch a lot of it. The second time they went out, I didnt' go I stayed behind at home with the babies. I lvoe that my girls got some time without the little ones with dad, they had so much fun, and so did dad! They needed some one on one daddy time. HEre are just a few pics from our first trip.....

Catching up.....OUR VALENTINES SUPRISE

2009-02-25T09:05:00.001-08:00

OUR VALENTINES DAY SUPRISE!!!

So, I have to tell you all how sweet my kids are, my older two in particular. Valentines has never really been Aaron and I's thing. We think its just a silly holiday & we both feel that romance should never be a forced thing that you feel you must do because its a holiday, right? Romance is spontanious and not forced, so although we tell each other Happy Valentines and we be silly and say...BE MINE SWEETY we just dont go out, nor do we buy each other things. So, that morning we woke up & Aaron had a chiropracter appt for his back so we got ready he and I and I took him down to it. Derian watched the kids while we went. She had been in the room with us that morning while we were talking, and we were teasing the girls cuz they asked us if we were going out for "love day" & we teased them saying...."oh how can we, we've got to many kids to go out, you guys are always around" and we all laughed and tickeled the girls. Anyhow so we left, and I called them just before we were getting ready to leave the office to tell them we're coming home and see how it was going. Derian said to me..."MOM don't come home, u cant, you and dad never get anytime alone together so go enjoy yourselves alone. Go to breakfast, but don't come home" So, I was like, ok.....but what are you doing.... she went on to say not to worry bout it, the babies were fine, and her and Ash was doing something for us and didn't want us home. SO, of course Aaron and I were like HEK YA....we went to our fav breakfast place in Spanish Fork and enjoyed a nice, quiet breakfast. It was time to go home, so we headed to the house and went inside. Der and Ash had us go to the living room where they had two chairs set in the middle. We instantly noticed the house smelled of fresh brownies, and the house was CLEAN! We sat down in our spots, & Der and Ash read us a letter each of them had written. THE SWEETEST letters EVER! I sobbed and sobbed as they both read them to us. They just said how much they loved us, and how much they loved that Daddy and I loved each other, & just a bunch of darling, sweet stuff. THen they gave us pictures they had drew and each a brownie w/ a valentine candy heart on it that said BE MINE. This made what normally would have been a regular day to Aaron and I, one of the most special days because of our girls, and what they did for us. It was nice to come home to the house clean and my favorite brownies nice and warm. They both did a great job, and we're so proud of them! Even daddy got choked up.....we were both very touched by their sweet and thoughtful idea. THANX GIRLS!
btw, just as a side note, the pic posted, isn't them making brownies on this occassion, its another time but it fit, so I am posting it.

A Tribute to my Better half.....

2009-02-09T21:16:00.001-08:00

Well sense its valentines this weekend & I wont have any pictures to post on my blog for a wk or so, I decided that I'd write a tribute to my dear husband for the "love" holiday coming up.

Aaron and I don't need a "special" day to share how much we care about one another. We love each other every day of the year, and we share that, and show that everyday too. Valentines to us, is everyday & thats what I love most about our relationship. We've always been affectionate with one another & its something that means alot to me.

So, I want to write a tribute to my dear husband whom I love so much for Valentines Day, & everyday. I guess sense its Valentines this saturday it seemed appropriate. Here are some wonderful things about my husband that I want to share with all of you because I am convinced my husband is one of the best men out there, but I am partial.

I love that we say "I love you" after every phone call, every morning, every night, every time we part ways, we say it even sometimes when there's nothing else to say.... I love that we hold hands still, & that we can sit for hours on the bed and talk and talk. I love that he'll hold me when I cry, and laugh with me when I'm happy.

I love the man that he has become. I fall in love with him all over again everytime I see him with his daughters, kissing on them, reading a story to them, playing with them, & just simply hanging out with them. I love that he will hold me in the middle of the night and not even know he is doing it.

I love how hard he works even though it drives me nuts sometimes when he isn't home with us, I know that he is working hard to give us the life that we have. I love that he cares about other people, & that he wants to do good for all. I love the passion that he has for his job, & how much he truly cares about the job he does for his boss & his customers. I'm so proud of how far he has come in his career but also that no matter what his pay is he still gives his boss 110% no matter what.
He is an amazing man, & I realize things about him that I love and appreciate every day we are together. I love that he cares so much about his family & that it shows in his eyes when he comes home & melts when his daughters come running towards him all wanting a hug and kiss from daddy. He is so patient with them, and loves to get down on their level and play & make them giggle. He is such a great father, & his love for his girls shows in every part of him.

The man he has become, is a man that I love, respect, cherish, & am so proud of. I am a very blessed women to have him in my life. His heart is bigger then I probably even know. I even love that he loves to have fun, & b active even though it sometimes means that he has to not be with us. I even love at times the kid inside.... I love that he calls me from work just to say he loves me, or to see how my day is going. I appreciate that he understands that I sometimes staying home all day with the kids is difficult & that he lets me vent my frustrations out when he gets home. I love that he listens, and understands that its sometimes difficult for me to express my emotions & that he is able to pull it out of me when he needs to. I love that he respects me, loves me for who I am (even though I make it hard to love me sometimes) & allows me to dream & pushes me to go for my dreams. He is extremely supportive of anything I want to do & will do anything for me to obtain those desires.

I love him because of his character, his values, his thoughts, and passion for life & all it has to offer. I love that he is who he is, & that I wouldn't EVER want to change that. I am a better person because of him.

On this Valentines Day I want to say I LOVE YOU & I am SO GLAD your mine! (and your stuck with me so u have to b happy too, haha) MUAH MUAH!

I LOVE you babe!

VALENTINES TAG

2009-02-05T13:58:00.000-08:00

Valentines Day Tag

What is your husband’s name? Aaron Kurt Poulson

*How long have you been married? 13.5yrs! WOW

*How long did you date? Well we started our journey on Oct 10, 1992 (sophmores in HS) and got married in Aug 95 so we dated like 3yrs High school sweethearts!

*How old is he? 32

*Who eats more sweets? DEFIANTLY ME! Aaron hates sweets, I think I've seen him eat candy like 4x's total our entire time of being together. He is a salt kinda guy

* Who said I love you first? Gosh, thats a hard one...we used to say "I love you" all the time, but I think that we were seniors or so when we finally really met it and it wasn't just the teenage "I love you" I know the moment I knew I loved him....it was when he gave me my cedar chest when we were Juniors, the next Christmas we got engaged.

* Who is taller? Aaron

*Who is smarter? Defiantly Aaron....thats no doubt, the boy is happy what he's doing, but he really shoulda been a Lawyer, or Dr.... he has BRAINS! and common sense, the two usually dont go together you either have one or the other, he has both!

* Who sings the best? umm, well neither one of us will b making American Idol ANY day soon, but probably me....

*Who sleeps on the right side? Aaron

*Who mows the lawn? He does MOST always, however sometimes I LOVE to suprise him and do it for him....ok, I admit, I have only done the whole suprise thing ONCE, but it felt good doing that for him, especially sense he's allergic to grass, and its irritating for him to do it.....

*Who cooks dinner? I do the cooking, and love to cook, but I wish Aaron would do it more, he really is a good cook. He loves trying new recipe's that HE develops. He is the one that developed our hamburger recipe

*Who drives? He does most always. I hate to drive, he loves to drive and would rather be driving. The boy has ADHD, I swear, he can't be sitting and doing nothing especially when we're on the road.....

*Who is first to admit they are wrong? Its equal there I'd say......although its harder for me to actually say I'm wrong, even though I am wrong, and he knows I'm wrong, it has nothing to do with me not wanting to be wrong, I just clam up.....he on the other hand, hands down will say I was wrong

*Who kissed who first? Well thats a funny story actually, lol....one I'm embarressed to this day over. We went out on a date, one of our first ones, and he walked me to the door, and I knew he would probably kiss me, so we both leaned in, and I sorta TOOK OVER the whole entire kiss, and kissed him moreso then he EVER expected me too, lets just say I wasn't shy about it, haha. He was a little suprised, but he went with it! He still teases me about that too. He says here I was tryen to be a gentlemen, and you just take over...Oops

*Who asked who out first? Aaron asked me to Homecoming 92, it was the beginning to our journey, and one we are still on. We've been best friends ever sense.... I absolutely adore this man!

I tag, Maradee, Amanda, Laura, Jessica.....and whomever else wants to do it

Kymbree's TIRED......

2009-01-30T21:17:00.001-08:00

So, I took the girls down to bowling last thursday. Aaron has league (I know NERDY) so we went down to eat dinner, and watch him for a little bit. Well we got home kinda late,it was bed time, and so tryen to get the kids off to bed, & playen on the computer while Kymbree laid down on my bed. Well she got up and told me she was going to go lie down with her sisters, so I was like..OK....

Well a half hour or so later in comes Derian to tell my something, and I said, "Gosh, did Kymee go to sleep" She said...NOPE, she isn't in there.....WHAT, I said.... then where is she?

We went to looken all thru the house, yellen, KYMEE...no answer, I looked in corner, under beds, in the bathroom, outside, I was freaken out. I headed back to my room to grab my phone to call Aaron, cause I was really nervous and when I walked back in this is what I found. LOL

The laundry basket was blocking my view of her from the computer, and when I walked out of the room I didn't see her at all....but when I walked back in I found her layen up against the wall, layen on the heater vent, her favorite place to be.....fast asleep! Isn't she cute? Needless to say, I was laughen hysterically, and had to snap a picture.

Because I CAN!

2009-01-30T15:15:00.000-08:00

Oh my goodness, I'm so proud of dam self today! I have wanted to share pics on my blog and facebook now for so long, and have been so sad that I can't share them. Well today I was determined to figure it out, and I spent a good part of the day doing so, but I figured it out! I can't upload them onto my computer, it won't let me, it crashes, so I put them all on a CD, and did it that way....who cares really, how it is done, I'm just glad its done!
So, here's some pics you all have missed out on.....now that I've figured it out, b prepared for me to show my babies off.
oh, and just thought sense I'm blogging I'd tell ya what we did today. Today was the kids incentive program at school. They got to do a "snow day" Ashlynn got to do ice sculptures and Derian got to go sledding. I went and visited both of them, and took the babies along. Derian wanted to take kymee k down one of the hills on the sled, I was reluctant, but I let her in the end.....scared the hell outta me. STEEP hills....ice, and a sled, don't go well with me. There have been so many accidents related to this sport. BUT....you gotta live....so they went, and they had a blast.
Anyhow other then that, I have been cleaning today, and laundry and grocery shopping. I havent sat down most the day. ooooo WAIT, thats a complete lie....because I did sit and figure out how to upload pics but that took a hr here and a hour there, NOT consecutive hours. lol

K, well I'm out, and enjoy a few of the pics

Just odds & ends of the last few wks.

2009-01-28T12:03:00.001-08:00

I havent' been blogging because I havent' had a whole lot going on. Nothing exciting, life changing, or inspiring so I decided that I'd just clue you all in on what we've been up to the last few weeks. Grab some popcorn, a pepsi, & enjoy the story...cuz it always tends to be with me, lol.

So last I posted we had almost brushed against death....well not really but we almost got ourselves into a nice wreck. We havent' had any of that, thank goodness. Derian started wearing make up, here and there for JUST for play, well she went over to a friends house this past weekend & I turned around to say good bye to her only to see a pound of make up on her face. I said HELL NO....she got mad at me for making her take it off. I said "sweety, there's a difference in wearing some lip gloss, & wearing make up like your 18" Later that night, her father had a bedroom talk with her about this boy, Johnny and her obsession w/him & the make up. He put an end to the make up all together. For the first time, I seen an attitude in Derian. Please tell me that this isn't starting all ready! She's a great kid, doesn't cause a lick of trouble, and doesn't want any trouble......but she can catch an attitude that I did see. She listens though, & she does have a shoulder on her head still so we're safe for now.

The girls and I had a "girls day" saturday while daddy was at work for awhile. My two oldest told me the other night that we hadn't had a girls day in a long time. We used to do it alot, and we haven't in so long. I used to take them out for the day, we'd go to lunch, and go shopping even if it was window shopping, but sense the babies have come along that hasn't happened and it made me feel bad. So, we did it, and it was great. It was a little different taking 4 of them rather then just the 2 of them but we still did it. We dropped dad off at work, and we went to the mall. Ashlynn and I got our haircut which was interesting to say the least, w/Kymbree and A'jaye running around the salon, but we made it. All the old ladies were sure looking at me, like I was the worst mother out there, but I didn't much care. Motherhood has come ALONG ways sense their day, right? Ashlynn got her hair cut SHORT, another short A-line cut, looks darling on her. I also decided to go drastic, not quite as short, but did a longer A-line, cut my hair to my shoulders. I hated it when I got home, but then played w/it, and did it my way and now I don't mind it. It's short though, above my shoulders. We decided after that adventure to go get some lunch. I used to take the two girls to Olive Garden, or a nice place, but we settled on Mcdonalds, lol. They didn't care, they just wanted time w/mom so thats what they got. We had to drag Kymbree outta there after a hour kicking and screaming cuz she wanted to play but we did it between Der, Ash & I.
We then called it a day, cuz we were all worn out. WE had a great time together though. I realized that I don't give my girls near enough "qualitity time" which is all they really want and need. We're going to make it a point to do that more often. Seems I spend most my time just tryen to get thru each day, instead of tryen each day to make the days count for my girls.

Later that night we were all sitting on the bed, hangen out and with my girls all around me we got to feel the baby move. This was like the BEST moment for me as a mother. Here I had all my girls around me, my belly poking out & exposed & all their little hands on my pregnant stomach getting all giddy cuz they could feel baby moving. It touched me in a way that nothing ever has. Ashlynn looked up at me and said, "mom why are you crying" ....I just told her..."its a mommy thing"

The wkend gets over as quickly as it starts sometimes, but we enjoyed. Aaron and I have decided that we aren't going to spend each night in our room watching TV while the kids are alone in the living room. So, once a week, whatever night works, we will have a family night. The girls decided they wanted to spend it practicing ROCKBAND so thats what we do, & we have a great time playing w/them. Its a nice change. I guess sometimes, you just get so tired at night that you forget that you need to spend time together as a family.

Dad, Derian & Kymee went down monday night and got hair cuts. This has always been Kymee and Dads thing to do every now and then. Derian just went along too this time. They got home a hour or so later, and Derian walked in w/her bangs chopped off. I turned around to look at her and all I seen was Chelsee staring back at me. Aaron has said for awhile that she looks like her Aunt, I seen it too, but not as much as I do now! So, we all have new haircuts and feel like new ppl now. Sorta fun! A'jaye is the only one that didn't get a new look...she's still MOHALK baby.

So there's whats been going on in our lives the past little while. Nothing to exciting or inspiring. Just everyday life w/our little girls!
Oh, P.S......you'll all b happy to know that I have figured out a way to include pics in my posts. It involves waiting for walmart to make me a CD, but I can do it now, so I will b including some pics w/our posts...YAY!

Do you always trust your intuitions??? YOU SHOULD!

2009-01-20T08:32:00.000-08:00

I've decided that I am ALWAYS going to trust my inner voice. There have been times in my life that I haven't listened to the inner voice & I've always regretted it even if it was a simple small issue. There's times that we brush off that voice within and justify it as just our craziness, or our own crazy anxiety talking to us, but how many times have you brushed it off and then regretted it afterwards and told yourself NEVER EVER will I brush off that voice with in even for something small, and then we do it anyhow? I am guilty!
Yesterday I was taught a valuable lesson about that inner voice. I really do try to pay attention when it's so strong you can't ignore the feeling but I did contemplate not listening thinking I'd be better off, but I'm glad I didn't. I drove Aaron to work yesterday morning & as you all have heard on the news, I'm sure, Utah County has been effected horribly by the inversion and the fog each morning and night has been just horrible. Yesterday was no exception it was the worst I've seen it. We got to his work fine, but took it extremely slow. You could only see maybe a quarter mile ahead of you and its just freaky cuz you feel like your in this box and its sorta claustrophobic. I dropped him off about 8:15 and then decided to stop at 7-11 & grab a slurpee because I'm pregnant and enjoy a frozen drink when I can get it. Then, I buckled A'jaye back up tight and I buckled up which I NEVER hardly do (I know NUTS) and I started messing with my phone getting back to a friend that had texted me the night before and just sat there for more then 10min or so taking my time as if I had nothing else to do but for some reason I was not in a hurry, now I know that was also a blessing.
We got on the freeway, A'jaye and I (the other girls were left at home w/Derian babysitting) & began for home. The fog was still really bad and it almost seemed worse then when I came over. You couldn't see the other side of the freeway, and if cars didn't have their lights on you couldn't see them until you got right up on them, which just scared me. I was going about 50mph, or less, but cars were passing me right and left I couldn't believe it. We kept on down the freeway & made our way to Spanish Fork, then to the Benjamin exit. Just right after that exit about 1/2 mile or so out of the corner of my eye I see all these men running towards me with flares in their hands, they just kept coming one by one. I was in the fast lane, why I don't know (another blessing) & all of a sudden I had to slam on my breaks QUICK. Two things were going for me, I wasn't going that fast, I had seen the men and started slowing down, & I was in the fast lane. Right in front of me, literally, RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME was a HUGE wreck involving 2 diesels and about 3-4 cars I couldn't tell. I was 2nd car on the scene after it happened that wasn't involved. It had JUST HAPPENED minutes before. Two diesels some how collided. I looked over at the red diesel in the slow lane and the whole driver side was completely smashed in the other diesel involved was width wise on the freeway had I not seen the men, I would've smashed into the truck in front of me then that diesel. There were several (3-4) cars in between the diesels that had also been involved.
Traffic obviously was at a stand still, no one could get by this the complete freeway was blocked off by the diesels and cars piled up between them. I was in the fast lane, THANK goodness so after sitting there a few minute (5min). The truck in front of me went down into the barrow pit & went around the diesel that was blocking both lanes. I sat there another 30sec or so and had this STRONG overwhelming sense to follow him. I hesitated because I didn't know if I could legally do that, you know how you question if its the right thing to do or not? No one was hurt, that I could see, and I had asked the girl standing right outside her car if she needed any help or needed to use my phone or not, and she said she was ok. The feeling just kept stronger in my mind and almost got louder. I kept hearing all these break screeching noises & when one got really loud I went down into the barrow pit and back up on the freeway. I just felt like if I stayed there I was going to be in a mess. I looked in my rear view mirror and could see the damage that was behind me and just was sorta shook up thinking to myself had I not stopped and got a drink I would've been either involved or something......you can't help but think that. Then you start thinking, how unknowingly you do something out of your normal routine, why? I got home to my girls awake and eating breakfast, and went on with my day as if nothing had happened and I didn't think about it beyond then.
Later that night, I sat down after not sitting all day long & watched the 5:00 news on Channel 2 & they started talking about the fog in Utah County and the huge pile up wreck between Spanish Fork and Payson. I listened of course because I was there, and it showed the diesels, and the car that was owned by the girl that I talked to, and then it showed the car that was behind me it was SMASHED UP pretty good. The reporter went on to say that two diesels had collided and other cars smashed into each other trying to avoid the diesel wreck, which was the 3-4 other cars that I seen were involved. Then he mentioned that after the first initial wreck several other pile ups occurred due to cars going to fast and not seeing because of the fog and wrecking into the already mess of cars . When I seen the car behind me wrecked and seen how badly it was smashed up I just sat there in shock knowing that had I stayed there, had I not listened to that still small voice (that was actually sorta loud in my head, nothing still or small about that), had I fought against what I felt I would've been hit as well, and who knows how badly, maybe not badly at all, but you never know. I felt bad that the guy behind me didn't follow us and maybe what we did wasn't right, but I could just say that God told me to do it, right? He did tell me right or wrong he did prompt me to follow the truck before me and so I did with hesitation but I am glad I got out of there and without being hit. They closed the freeway down for 4 HOURS.
Anyhow, that was a long story but with me everything is a long story, you all know this about me, you should be used to it by now, right?
So, moral of the story is........ LISTEN to the not so still, LOUD voice when its there, don't ignore it even if you think that it's not a big deal because it could be a big deal if you don't listen to it. Like I mentioned earlier, there hasn't been a time that I didn't regret it when I didn't listen to that voice. Its' important & God has given us this blessing to protect & guide us throughout our lives & its up to us to either use it or ignore it. I don't always do the right things in my life, & I'm far from perfect. I don't always live my life religiously, going to church or studying the scriptures, BUT I have ALWAYS believed in God, prayed daily, & I've always payed close attention to my feelings, sometimes known as the still small voice. We all have intuitions & we should never take that gift God gave us all for granted, I know I defiantly won't after this experience especially.

Aaron is faced with the BOY ISSUE! (he thought this day would never come)

2009-01-16T10:56:00.001-08:00

YAY! The weekend is upon us, and its a long weekend with Monday being a holiday. The girls are out of school today for teacher development day & Monday also for MLK day. I don't mind my older girls being home with me at all its actually a relief to me. They help so much with the baby's and that free's me up to do some things I can't do otherwise. I also enjoy their company. Derian is getting to be so much fun, and quite the little chatty kathy.
I had their parent/teacher meetings last night and of course they are both doing so well. I'm especially proud of Ashlynn she has come WAY up on her reading level and spelling. We only have a few things to work on with her & she'll be right where she needs to be. Derian, of course, is doing SUPER. Her teacher didn't have enough room to write all the good things. I'm so proud of both my girls. They've both come so far, and are both doing so well. I'm impressed with how smart they are. I only wish that for Derian, she wouldn't be so afraid to speak her mind sometimes, and wish for Ashlynn that she wouldn't be SO hard on herself or compare herself ALL the time to her older sister. She's always in her sister's shadow and I wish she'd break away from that and be her own person. We are working on that and I guess its just a normal thing for sister's to do especially being so close in age. I just hope it doesn't continue their WHOLE life.
Ashlynn is a good enough person on her own she doesn't need her sister to help her with that.

OH BOY, our house will be INTERESTING come 3-4yrs thats all I can say. With Derian entering teenage years, and Ashlynn quickly to follow, and then A'jaye and Kymbree tagging behind. AHHHHHH!
Derian has been talking about this boy at school that she and her friends like. He's a 5th grader so older then she is by a few years. I'm super glad that she can talk to me about it without being funny. She used to be so funny about boys and would cry if we teased her, remember that? lol. Well she isn't so shy anymore about it and its sorta cute, but she was talking to her dad and I on the bed last night just being chatty kathy. Aaron and I were listening and of course I knew some of the stuff already but Aaron hadn't. Aaron was sorta watching TV and half listening like men do, and then she mentioned this boy and he still was half listening, and then she said "Oh, and he's a 5th grader" and Aaron stopped dead in his tracks, turned to her and said "OH HELL NO" I was laughing so hard....the look on his face was priceless. She just giggled and continued with her story of him. She showed a picture of him, and then he said...."OH HELL HELL NO, he's a skater dude" He was NOT impressed. She left the room after a minute and I looked at him and said....You better get used to this! He said...I already hate having daughters! Then she comes back in the room and he starts in on a 5 hour daddy/daughter session on how she doesn't need any boy, and how no one is good enough for her, and how boys are evil and are no good, & on and on and on. I thought it was so cute that he was genuinely worried about this situation and after I told him that its just a 3rd grade crush, and she hadn't even talked to the kid. SO FUNNY!
He went to bed that night and said..."I can't take all these girls, it'll give me a heart attack to sit and worry about every boy out there" then he looked at me and said...."you have NO idea how bad I despise them little bastards, I know what they are thinking" and I was like..."OH COME ON,we aren't to that "point" yet she has a crush, she isn't going out with him she hasn't even stood by him" and he said..."GOOD we'll keep it that way"
I just had to chuckle..... poor guy is going to give himself a heart attack over a simple elementary crush, what will he do when the real dating happens.
Someone please pray for my husband, I think he needs help coping with so many daughters! I guess I just really don't understand what he's going thru, but I'm a girl, and I DONT know what goes thru male minds, to be honest I DONT WANT TO KNOW! hahaha

It's like I told Aaorn, WELL....you can't worry about all them boys, you just have to worry about your daughters. Love them, be there for them, build them up and they'll do just fine on their own with the boys. He gave Derian this huge lecture on how she in NO WAY, SHAPE or FORM should find a boy like her dad. After she left I looked at him and said....The best thing she could do is to find a boy like you! I meant that too! I reminded him how respectful he was to me always & to my family. He didn't always want to have the basement talks with my dad, but he did & respected every word spoke to him. All I can hope is that my girls DO find a man like their dad, just like I found a guy like my dad. No one is perfect, and everyone has their issues, which is all most people see in themselves, but the person inside is whats important and I'd say that I did pretty dam good with that. I hope my girls can too! We're all a little early for any of those worries. I just found this story to be funny, and wanted to share. we havent' even BEGUN the boy business, thank goodness I don't think that my dear husband is ready for that stage in his daughters lives.

Until next time.......

POP goes the belly!

2009-01-15T07:23:00.001-08:00

Well, as you all are aware we are expecting for the 5th, and I might add, THE FINAL time. I am now 18weeks & have been wondering just when my stomach will go POP, however I am not wondering anymore it finally made its debut. I wish I could share a photo with you all but I can't.
I can't believe it went from barely nothing to BAM, you defiantly know there's a baby in there. I was enjoying my flat tummy though and sense I'd lost so much weight the past month I actually had reached my weight goal and then some, but that didn't prove to be such a proud accomplishment when your expecting and needing to gain some weight not loose it in huge amounts. I had lost even more sense my last dr appt which he won't be giving me high fives over either. BUT, I have started to gain back the weight so maybe he won't be to hard on me.
I've struggled more this pregnancy then I ever have with appetite. I just don't have one at all. I don't really get hungry, and when I am NOTHING sounds good at all. Most thoughts of food make me want to vomit. I can't, in any way, eat any greasy foods. If the food has been cooked in any grease it makes me sick. I tried last night for the first time in a long time to eat fast food, and I was hungry as I've ever been and caught a smell of the fries YACK! I lost my appetite right there and ate like a bite of my sandwich. Aaron came over to me, grabbed my sandwich, took out the grilled chicken and handed the chicken to me and said EAT IT! He's been after me to feed his baby, lol.
About the only thing I do enjoy eating, and actually crave it most days is STEAK, and not just any steak, it has to be a good, expensive cut of beef. Thank goodness we have most our steaks left from our cow we got last year. I've been cooking them like crazy. We have steak almost every night. No one is complaining. For my birthday I made "Bree's fav's" (for everyone's bday I make them their favorite meal, no matter what it is, so I had to do it for myself too, lol) it consisted of marinated beef tenderloins (YUM, to die for) my mother in law, Susans tossed green salad (SO GOOD, thanks for the recipe) & of course we can't forget our beloved STUFFED MUSHROOMS! I'm salivating right now just thinking about them. I made 2 cookie sheets of stuffed mushrooms and I ate them all, I even caught myself hiding the left over ones so I could eat them the next day all to myself, and then even worse (like a little kids would) I secretly warmed them up the next day and went and hid in the bathroom & ate like 6 of them by myself. haha! Sorry kids!
I always have the ingredients on hand to make them you never know when the craving will come on.

So, anyhow..... my belly has POPPED out, even if I was still in denial over this pregnancy it would have to be dealt with at this point because this baby is very active and making himself/herself known. Not only am I showing obviously now, this baby is very active, probably moreso then any other baby I've carried. Baby Poulson starts early too, kicking and turning and flipping around at 6a.m. Baby doesn't stop during the day either, and then keeps going as soon as I lie down for bed and relax. Every time I feel baby move it moves me emotionally. I'm highly emotional this time anyhow (making my husband crazy cuz I'm not really a cryer) so feeling baby move around is really touching to me. I guess I just didn't really want another and the way it all came about is just proof to me that this baby is meant to be with us for whatever reason it wouldn't let us forget about its spirit. I had to go get Aaron from work and last night as I was driving into Provo on 500 west I drove past the hospital and I looked all the way up to the top level where the delivery rooms are, and the room I delivered A'jaye in was being used. The light was on and you could see activity going on in side. An instant fear, and flashback came over me of A'jaye's birth and how hard it was on me and her. I just got upset and anxious inside I won't lie to anyone the thought of delivering this baby scares the hell right out of me. We had a VERY hard delivery with A'jaye it was scary, it was stressful, it was hard, long, and traumatized me and Aaron both....but just as quickly as the thoughts and fear came into my mind they just as quickly were taken out and replaced with a calming feeling that things would be fine. So, I guess I have to trust those instincts and feelings and hope that they are real. I know that this baby is meant for our family and is already very much apart of it. I already love this baby so much and can't wait to meet him/her. We have no names yet, so those that have asked DONT KNOW....NO CLUE, NO IDEAS.... and we have defiantly decided NOT to find out what it is. We have our Ultrasound in a few weeks, but we aren't finding out. We think it may be better for us, and maybe funner. We just feel like finding out is a bad idea. I'll be 100% honest, if its a girl and we find out this early, we WILL go thru the remainder of the pregnancy disappointed, we love this baby EITHER WAY, but the honest facts are we will be somewhat heart broken, and neither of us want to feel that way, or go thru the remainder of our pregnancy feeling that way so just finding out when baby arrives will be better because no matter what it is, when its in your arms you don't give a dam what it is, boy or girl your just happy its with you, in your arms and healthy and safe.
So, NO we aren't finding out this time, it will be a surprise either way, and a surprise that we will love no matter what the sex. I just wish these dreams of twins would leave my night time dreams!!!!!
Thats all for now!

Yep, we're still alive, and still blogging

2009-01-11T20:07:00.000-08:00

Well...my goodness, Christmas came and went, and 2008 did too! Our Christmas was GREAT! One of the best Christmas's we've had in a while. We went down home the wkend before Christmas and had Christmas parties with Aaron's families with his mom Saturday morning, and then his dad that evening. It was great to see everyone and spend time as a family. We also exchanged gifts with my parents as well but I knew I'd be seeing them during Christmas break.
We left for Durango, CO on tuesday night the 23rd. IT was probably 5pm by the time we got out of town, and it was a slow trip all the way thru Utah, then it got faster. We reached our destiantion at 12:30a.m. Aaron and the boys...(his dad and step brother) stayed up till like 3am playing the WII and catching up. The kids and I went to bed. Christmas Eve was spent as a family doing family stuff, we had a wonderful prime rib dinner and then headed into Durango for the Polar Express with the kids. MY GOSH, it was so much fun for them. So believable and so fun. It was worth it, every bit of it. Santa came and went and Christmas was spent with family all around us. Aaron enjoyed his dad, step mom and step brother as did I. I just love Aaron's dad he is the most loving guy ever and his step mom is fun, and loveable too. His step brother Daniel, I hate to use the term "step brother" cuz this guy is like his blood brother, they are really close for as short of time they have been in each other's lives. We love Daniel, and the girls love him as their fav uncle ever!
Thanks Dad and Susan for a great Christmas it was fabulous! We also got the chance on fri to jet over to Farmington, from Aaron's dads place its only 45min in good weather...course it took me close to 1.5hours but it was snowing. We hung out with the Wheelers for a little while but quickly had to get back, we stayed long enough to give everyone the stomach flu. A'jaye had come down with it half way to Farmington so we drove back to Durango to care for her. We got back home sunday evening and I, and Ashlynn and Kym had all come down with the flu by then. Aaron the next day stayed home from work even, due to having it. So, not a good way to end our trip but it was ALL worth it.
Our New Years Eve was different then most, we usually spend it with a butt load of our friends, partying it up with lots of food, and games and.....yes, drinking (not me, usually I'm the DD.... ) but this year as well as last we didn't do either one of those. We spent this year at home and partied with our older two girls, the younger two gave out. We played Rockband with each other and a few of Aaron's buds that I have taken on as "second husbands" I just love these guys....they stayed for a little while and played Rockband with us, we played in the New year but I had to turn it off just before to watch the ball drop...the kids thought that was cool, and then they ran outside as cold as it was and did firecrackers, and banged pots and pans yelling HAPPY NEW YEAR...to all the old folks already in bed for the night, but hey......we were awake we thought they should be too!
We had a first dr's appt sense I last posted too... heard my babies heartbeat, got measured, you know all the normal stuff. I've lost quite a bit of weight in the last few wks, even more sense going to the dr. I just don't seem to have an appetite, like NONE at all. The thought of food makes me sick, and I just dont get hungry. The dr told me if I don't gain any weight we may have to do "other" measures....mmmm, better get to eating. He told me to up my protein if anything. Its been hard for me.....my clothes aren't getting tight, their getting loose! I'm in pants I havent been in months and months......I mean hek, I love the fact that I am loosing weight but dang its not a good time for that!
I think my appetite is coming back however, Aaron took me to my favorite Japanese steak house saturday for dinner (early bday) and i PIGGED OUT! I was starving. I never am able to eat all my food there and I ATE IT ALL, and some of his too. He was like...."Dam, baby, you making up for lost food?" haha....then I came home and ate, a frozen pepsi, some chex mix, swedish fish, and chips. Yea, I think its coming back a little. Now, I just need to watch that I eat the right things and stay on top of the weight gain....instead of weight loss.
We're getting our U/S done next appt, I'm moving right along at 17wks now...YIKES! We're still torn as to whether we'll find out what it is. I keep having dreams that there are two!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT, it is a nightmare! one is always a boy, but the other NO clue...what it is, I can never see its face. maybe its cuz its just my fear, and its not really so everyone keeps telling me I'll get two...course I cringe at the sound of one right now still.
NAH, jk, I am getting excited, I felt the baby move the other day and sobbed all night. Aaron was like...MY GOSH hormones! Its always touching when you feel your baby move the first time, makes it real I guess.
Anyhow....we are all still alive, and kicking. Kids are well, Aaron's work is picking up (all the snow=wrecks) and life is getting easier with Kym and A'jaye. They are learning to play so cute together, but Kymee is teaching her BAD BAD things.....lol. They have so much fun terrorizing this house and me all day but I love it.
Tomorrow is another day......another week started. We'll see what it brings~

Christmas Letter......

2008-12-14T09:11:00.000-08:00

Well, usually people send a "end of year" family update w/their Christmas cards, however I decided to just do it on our blog, and include the blog address w/our cards so those that want can read our "brag" letter and those that would rather not don't have to.

I can't believe how fast this year has flown by. It seems like we just celebrated Christmas in 07 and now here we are again. My dad always said enjoy the moments because in a twinkling of an eye your kids are grown and you wish you had those moments again. Time flies, kids get older, we get older, and it is all in the twinkling of an eye it seems.

We have ALOT to be grateful for this year. Our family is so blessed and I realize that more and more everyday as I take time to focus on the positive in our lives more then the negative. Its easy to focus on all the negatives, and is a natural thing for us to do, but we've really tried to change our way of thinking and it has enriched our lives so much.

Wonderful things have happened in the year 2008 for us. Derian got every award possible at the end of her 2nd grade year, some included Top Speller in the entire 2nd grade (I'm bragging here but her and one other boy in the entire 2nd grade were spelling on a 6th grade level), Best in Math, Most thoughtful of others, Top reader.....and so many more. We are truly so proud of her. She also started 3rd grade, which was an eye opener for me. I think I realized that my little girl is turning into a young lady. She has many friends, and her teacher told me this past parent/teacher meeting that she is always including those that don't have someone to play with. That made me so proud of her. In the summer of 08 Derian was baptised. As her parents we are so proud of her. She made this decision on her own, and has taken these commitments to her Father in Heaven very seriously. Sense her baptism she has been studying the Book of Mormon and I will often catch her in a quiet corner reading this book. It makes me so proud of her for her eagerness to learn of the gospel. She has such a strong spirit, and tender heart.

Our little Ashlynn, our beautiful brown eyed girl. She finished up her 1st grade year with the most wonderful teacher. She mastered reading which was a huge accomplishment for her. She went from not reading at all to one of the top readers in her class. Her teacher would always tell me what a wonderful, sweet student she was and always so willing to help out. She also started 2nd grade & currently has been getting consistent Perfect Speller awards. She has come along ways, and has worked hard to be at the top of her class this year. We are so proud of her. She's preparing to get baptised this spring, and is reading and learning everything she can about this special, important step in her life. She is also looking forward to attending activity days w/her sister. Ashlynn is becoming such a responsible little girl and helps me out so much as well. She's very attentive of her little sisters and LOVES helping out her daddy outside with yard work. She's always been a "daddy's girl" which Aaron just enjoys so much. She's the girl that loves to help w/dirty greasy things, and fascinated with fixing vehicles or mowing the lawn, yet she can clean up and want to be a girly girl too. We love her SO much!

Little Kymbree, whom calls herself KYMEEEEE K Poulton. She is the joy of our world, yet can make us INSANE all at the same time. We always tease that she is her great granpa Lloyd all over again w/her pretty grey blue eyes, and her teasing manner. She loves to pester her sisters and gets sooo excited when the get home from school. She wants to be big just like them, and they are good examples for her. We know she loves her little sister "jj" (as she calls her) but she has a hard time sharing mom and daddy time with her. She turned 3 in November and each day gets a little easier with her cause she's growing so big. She'll start school in January and she couldn't be happier about that.
Next, little A'jaye she has given us some scares this year with her heart, but we feel blessed that it could be something far worse, and her condition is very manageable and fixable so for that we feel blessed. She is such a delight to have around and always so happy and laid back. She loves to dance and anytime she hears the music she boogies to the beat. She keeps smiles on our faces, and laughter in the house.
Aaron and I love all our girls and feel so blessed. Aaron is doing wonderful in his job and although its slow right now because of the economy he still manages to keep work for his guys. He's a hard worker and I couldn't be more blessed to have him in my life. As for me, well....I'm just busy and wrapped in my kids lives and I like it that way most days. Some days I wonder what I signed up for, but I really am such a lucky and blessed women, and I have much to be grateful for.
There's our lives in 2008. We hope for another great year in 2009 with many blessings and maybe a boy??? That would be nice, but we'll feel blessed and happy no matter what we get this June.
We appreciate ALL our family and love you all so much. We hope the season brings you many happy times, and the new year full of rich blessings. Thanks for the support and love you give to our family, and from ours to yours....MERRY CHRISTMAS!

THANKS AMANDA & LAURA

2008-12-12T00:48:00.000-08:00

Well I just have to say THANKS ALOT!
All this talk of stuffed mushrooms and wanting the recipee had me craving them BIG time tonight. I couldn't get rid of the craving till I made them.....so off to walmart I went at 9pm to get my ingrediants...the whole time I'm thinking....ummm, I really don't have the energy to make them tonight, but you know a pregnant craving, it doesn't let up!

So here I was at 10pm making stuffed mushrooms. When Aaron got home at 10:30 from bowling league we ate a WHOLE pan of them together, and I wish that I'd made more, but I left the other half to make tomorrow, then I found myself at 12:30 dipping triscuit crackers in the left over dip....UMMM! YOu spread that dip on the triscuit like a chz spread, and OMG its so yummy! O and I broke down and drank a coke too....I was craving coke big time! It was better then I remembered it being too.
NOw here I am at 2a.m.....and can't sleep, but those dang mushrooms were so yummy!

What else???
mmmmm, I guess thats it for now. My life is boring right now.
I'll be back when things pick up around here!!!

Tis the Season.........

2008-12-08T07:18:00.000-08:00

to think about Santa, or to think about the Savior and all he has given and sacrificed for our lives?
I've really been bothered lately by something my Mother in law Susan told me about a month or so ago when we were talking about Christmas and the different ways we celebrate it. Ever sense I talked with her its had me thinking a great deal about how we're teaching our children and the message we send to them.
She told me that she never taught her kids about the legend of Santa nor did Santa ever visit their homes. Its how she was taught growing up to so it was no big deal to her to continue that tradition on to her family. She made me realize thru talking that maybe putting so much focus on "Santa" isn't the best message to send our kids. As I drive by homes I pay attention to the themes of the decor and I see more Santa Clauses then I do Nativity scenes or angels and things like that. We make a big deal about Santa Clause, and the gifts he brings when your a good kid and good student, but is what we're teaching our kids the right thing? This is what I've been asking myself ever sense I talked with Susan.
She said growing up, and also with her kids she was never denied, NOR did she deny her kids anything that other kids got during Christmas the only difference was they woke up Christmas morning to not "Santa" gifts, but gifts given by loved ones, their parents, and others. They got the normal things, a stocking filled with goodies and small trinkets, something sat out as if Santa had brought it, and gifts under the tree. The things they got however were given by people that loved them most, and that is what they were taught, the gift of giving to those you love and others. They put focus on family, love, giving, the true meaning of CHRISTmas, and not the make believe, or commercialized things that come with Christmas too. She said that she grew up with no resentment, or feelings of being denied anything from her childhood but more of a appreciation of the things they were given because they new where it came from it didn't come from a "magic bag" where Santa has an endless supply of money and gifts.
I tell ya, this really has me thinking if we're teaching our kids that Santa is the theme for Christmas rather then Christ, and his birth and what he brought to the world and to our lives.
When I see people shorten Christmas and put Xmas, it makes me sick. You might as well be "X-"ing out Christ, cuz that's what it reminds me of. I refuse to ever write it that way even in texting and I'm trying to shorten everything I write, I did it once and it bothered me all day. I think alot of people, maybe even myself at times, get caught up in "Santa" and X out Christ in Christmas, not on purpose but just because you get caught up in the whole holiday thing for your kids and the fun of it all. I ask myself though now if that's not giving them false belief or even putting the wrong message out there.
I know growing up my parents, along with many others, did the "Santa" thing, and I know that although we were very excited about Santa coming we also knew what Christmas was really about and just like my mother in law Susan wasn't denied anything from childhood by not having a Santa, I wasn't taught any less about Christ and the true meaning of Christmas by having a Santa so I guess we just can't let ourselves get caught up in the whole "Santa" part of CHRISTmas but rather put more of our time and focus on Christ and his life.
What my mother in law, Susan said that day really made me think ALOT, and I still do think about it. I know that my kids believe in Santa, and to take that away from them now I can't do, but I look at Kymbree, and A'jaye and the baby coming and wonder....mmmmm, do I? I think what we're doing this year is the right thing for us to do....we're only having "Santa" bring ONE thing and their stocking the rest is coming from people they love and they will know that. Santa is a fun part of Christmas, its fun for the kids and fun for the parents but I think sometimes we do put to much focus on that part of Christmas instead of the real meaning. Santa can NOT over due Christ and the true meaning of why we have Christmas.
Anyhow...those are my thoughts this week.....this has been on my mind for a long time. I guess it bothered me that As a Mormon, a religion focused on Christ and living Christ like, we sometimes put more focus on the commercialized part of Christmas then we should. We profess Christmas is about Christ but is it? maybe at some point we all put to much focus on the other parts of Christmas then we should but we need to get back to the core....
Its easy to get caught up in the "fun" parts of Christmas, Santa, reindeer, his sleigh and how he gets to all the kids, and listening for the bells, his magic bag, and making food for his reindeer. The kids love this and their imaginations are endless, ....I think that having the belief of Santa in our homes is ok, but it should be a very SMALL part about Christmas. There's so much more to teach our kids that is meaningful and real.
One thing I know for sure is that Christmas is about FAMILY and spending time together, and family traditions small or big. The smallest things you do as a family each year are the things that stick with them the most. Like our Lloyd Christmas tree, even this touches Aaron. He thinks its the neatest thing ever that my parents tree consist of everything us kids ever made as kids, the popcorn strung that has held up for 28+ yrs, the ornaments we painted together each year. Its fun to look at it each year and remember those times we had. Those are the kind of things that stick with kids and mean so much to them as they get older. Small and simple things......
I don't remember everything I ever got for Christmas or what I didn't get I remember the family things we did together and that is what we need to remember as parents.

love ya guys

We've got a wonderful family!

2008-12-03T09:40:00.001-08:00

I just wanted to make this quick, MAN, I'm long winded, sorry guys I have alot to say all the time.
Just wanted to say THANKS for all your kind words, and support in this new journey in our lives that we defiantly didn't really want to take again but here we are and the excitement is taking over.
It wasn't that I was scared to tell any of our family, I just new that you all would feel the same way I felt when we found out....WHAT!!!??? NOT AGAIN! lol but as I look at my girls and the sweet spirit they bring to our family I can't help but think to myself how lucky and blessed we are and how honored we feel that these spirits choose us to be their parents. (WHy I don't know what they seen in us, but we are glad they picked us) As the days go by and I except this a little more each day I realize that this baby really is meant to be w/us, and to be honest I felt there was one more all along, I just decided after A'jaye that I couldn't do that again, but this baby didn't let us forget about him/her. I just hope that this baby is a little easier on me then A'jaye was.
Although things will be hectic, crazy, and MADLY INSANE I figure..HEK, its already insane so whats one more going to change. I also have figured that sense we were meant to have one more, I can just be thankful it happened now while I'm in "baby mode" then for it to have happened like at age 40-45....that would really suck...lol
Well thats it....just wanted to thank ya all for the phone calls, love, and support it means alot to us.
SEE, I can keep it somewhat short....

Breaking our silence.............

2008-12-01T17:59:00.000-08:00

Well, Aaron and I were sorta thinking we'd make a huge secret public knowledge this weekend at dinner possibly, or sometime when the moment seemed right. Right after Dad got done talking, as everyone was seated for Thankgiving dinner, Aaron looked at me like.."now's the time, babe" and as I looked down the table (cuz I was standing near dad) and I seen all your beedy eyes and hungry glares I instantly got intimidated by ya all. lol! So you can say that I chickened out. I don't know why, its not a bad announcement, just a bit shocking is all. Anyhow, Aaron thinks its terrible of me to make an announcement like this on our family blog but my idea is different, what better place to share this at then a place you all come to read about our milestones, the changes and seasons of our lives so with that said we'll announce it here......Aaron and I are PREGNANT!

I know, I know......(Mom, I couldn't stand to keep this from you...but I can also see you right now GASPING for air....take a deep breath!, you too dad...I'll be ok!) we have a gazillion kids its seems like, and i have two very little ones but this isn't what we planned thats for sure. I don't feel like I need to explain or justify this to any of you, but when we found out we were infact devastated beyond belief. I won't get into details but we were taking ALL measure to prevent this and with an IUD in place for almost a year we still conceived this baby against all odds. When the Dr told me after taking out my IUD I spent the whole day in Aarons arms crying myself to a headache and two swollen eyes. My poor husband, a man that wants desperately to fix things whenever I'm crying, couldn't fix this one for me, he had to just cradle me in his arms and let me cry while he rubbed my face, and wiped my tears. It was tuff for him, I know cuz he hates when I'm upset, not to mention he was experiencing his own emotions over it. Needless to say, after the tears and anger had passed Aaron said something to me very meaningful and it must've been what I needed to hear from him. He said, this baby is a gift from God and for some reason this baby, against all odds, is meant to be in our family, and we have to except the honor of being this babies parents and family. NO, this isn't what we wanted, Aaron is scheduled to get fixed in January so I guess this sweet spirit thought ...O CRAP, I had better hurry! lol.

We feel blessed that the baby is ok due to the circumstances it could have been under with the IUD device. Its very dangerous, and to anyone thinking about using an IUD DONT DO IT! I wish I would have done my research. This could have been a very grim situation, and for that we feel blessed that we didn't have to go thru any part of that.

Although our house is about to go from NUTS, to INSANELY NUTS its ok, cuz honestly I've realized sense finding out that my place is to be a mother, and instead of thinking of it all the time as a hardship, and alot of work that is tiring, I've started thinking of it as a blessing that I'm able to be just a mother at home with my babies and I've started to embrace this job that God has blessed me with. YOu always want what you don't have, I've wanted a career for the past while and had made plans to go after it, but if I had a career I'd wish that i could just be a mom so embracing what we have, and the life that God has blessed us with is the ultimate challenge for all of us at times. I've actually learned alot about myself this last week so this baby has a purpose and so the journey begins.

We are due sometimes the end of June, and YES I would be lying to all of you if I told you we weren't hoping and praying for a son, but honestly Aaron and I just are hoping and praying for a healthy little baby, and a safe delivery. I was upset when I found out NOT because I'm going to have 5 kids, I was upset because I know my body really had a ruff time with delivering A'jaye and she had a ruff time too.......this is and was my concern, but everytime my mind goes there I'm always overwhelmed with the idea that this baby is strong, and determined (obviously) and wants to be here with us, things will be fine. So, there ya go. I'm proud of my girls for keeping a secret, they were dying to tell everyone they talked too this past weekend but we had told them that it was mom and dads job to let the secret out. We love our girls, and the more that the idea of another one settles in our heart and mind the more we embrace the fact that this baby must be something special and we couldn't be more happy about it. THe news is out!

LOVE YA ALL!

Loved Our Thanksgiving!!!

2008-11-29T23:26:00.000-08:00

Well I just have to say that Thanksgiving this year ROCKED! What a great time we all had. Thank you Trent and Robyn (and kids) for allowing all of us crazy people to hang at your place all day. IT was really nice to have everyone there. I really enjoyed the family and the kids playing and having a great time. My girls just enjoy so much being with their cousins. They were sad to go. Thank you Robyn and girls for all those clothes! We love hand me downs! All the good food, all the chaos, it was just what I needed! I had my family fix for a year....haha! I just want to say real quick (I know I'm long winded, you all know that bout me) I love all of you so much, and care deeply for everyone of you. Thanks dad for your sweet speech, everyone was teary eyed and it meant alot to all of us to have you say those words. Your a man of few words, as Aaron would say, but when you do talk its meaningful and heart felt. I've always said my dad doesn't have to say a word, he says it all in his eyes. I've always known what you were saying without you even saying it!
The Lloyds need to get together more often..... see how much fun we all have, just look at Amanda's blog and all those pictures it says it all!

I'm so thankful for my family, our good health, and the many things that God has blessed us with everyday that we take for granited. There's much to be greatful for in our lives and we strive everyday to be MORE thankful for those little things and little blessings.

Love ya all!

Weekend is over, &short work week begins!

2008-11-24T08:14:00.000-08:00

3 days to Thanksgiving! YEA, its here almost. This is by far my favoritest holiday. I don't know why I love it so much, but I do. I think Christmas is most people's favorites but its not one of mine. ITs to busy, stressful, & so commercialized. I think that is what bothers me the most....the meaning of the holidays have been taken out and we all sorta just fall into the trap of forgetting what its all about because of the hustle and bustle of it all.
This year Aaron and I have decided to turn over a new leaf for a couple of reasons. For one, saving money has become more important then ever for obvious reasons, and for two, our children need to learn appreciation and that material things are fun but they break, get lost, become worn and no fun anymore however values, appreciation, and family is ALWAYS with you and is what makes the holidays what they are. THink about it.....if you had a nice turkey dinner with all the best food you can think of and no family to share it with, then what would you have? You wouldn't have Thanksgiving, it would just be a turkey dinner. What if you had a Christmas tree, decorated to the hill, presents galore, and everything material you could ever dream of having, and NO family to share it with, no family to wake up excited to be with, all you would have is material things laying in front of you. Family makes the holidays what they are, its not the wonderful, yummy, full of calories meal, its not the gifts, and stockings, and Christmas tree, its the family that makes them so special to us.
This is what we want to teach our children. Not only that, but Thanksgiving is about being thankful for what you have, your family, the blessings that God has blessed you with, Christmas is about Jesus, and serving others, and thinking of those less fortunate.
Each Christmas Eve I allow my girls to open one present, this present is a Christmas book always about the meaning of Christmas. The next morning, Santa gives them, before they are allowed to look at what he gave them, something to go along with the story we read. Then he leaves them a token to help remind them about that story and the lesson it brought. The first year I did this it was the story about the Chrismtas Orange about a little girl that grew up in an orphange, all they got was a ymmmy orange and they were as happy to get that as they were if they'd gotten a box of toys. Its ALL they got. SO when they woke up the next morning on Christmas Morning, in the living room where they thought they'd have their toys was a plate with orange wedges on it, and a note explaining what they should remember in the story. I didn't realize what an impact this tradition would have on them, or if it even meant anything at all to them but my girls told me last night that this is one thing that means the most to them at Christmas, and it touched me because I think that we as parents can make our kids unappreciative, and materialistic. They actually don't care how many gifts they get, or what you COULDNT give them. We put that stress on ourselves when all that matters to these special spirits is being with us, their family.
THis year Aaorn and I have decided to SIMPLIFY, and bring back more of the important things. TO not stress over what we couldn't get them, or if there is enough presents under the tree. Kids love to get things, you can't change that about anyone, but what really matters to them is family, and when they have that they are secure, happy, and have everything they want. Kids are simple, we are the ones that make it complicated.

Anyway, I just thought I'd share these thought with you all...... and I can't wait to see you all thursday.....

Happy BIRTHDAY KYMEE K!

2008-11-21T10:21:00.000-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KYMBREE!

I can't believe she is three already, how times flies. ALthough I have to admit that I am relieved a little that she's getting a bit older, but as I've learned quickly the stubborness, and thick headed only gets worse.....

She came into this world on Nov 21, 2005 in the late afternoon/early evening. I remember I pushed and pushed for hours with no results. She simply didn't want to leave where she was at, either that or SOMEONE was keeping her with him. She has lots of family that has past on, but one in particular just happened to be keeping her around to help celebrate his birthday. I had to finally say, "Grandpa Lloyd PLEASE let her go" about 5 minutes later she was born just a crying. The Dr cleaned her up and Aaron placed her in my arms. This little girl and I met eye to eye, but I was taking from her eyes to her cheeks where I instantly seen what appeared to be whisker burns. I said out loud..."OH my gosh, she has whisker burns" Aaron looked at me puzzled, but I knew what it meant. I couldn't believe my eyes, but an instant warming came over my heart and I just knew that this was Grandpa Lloyds way of telling me he was there, and that he loved me, and this sweet baby too. I just sat there and cried, because the feeling was very over whelming.

Those whisker burns didn't stay long, but his personality lives on in her. She even has his unique color of eyes, so I've been told....she has a very pretty hue to her eyes of grayish blue just like he has. Kymbree is a unique little girl......and so special to us.

Although she challenges my parenting, and makes me question my sanity at times she also keeps our home full of laughter and love. Our family wouldn't be complete without her.

She loves her sisters and wants to be just like her older ones, but sometimes wants to beat up her little one.......although she loves her little JJ (as she calls her) we know she does because she constantly is her protector. When JJ gets by the stairs, or is doing something she shouldn't the whole house knows it because Kymbree is caught hauling her off by the neck, or arm as they are both screaming bloody murder.

She if full of love and life.....always so happy and pestering someone. She is a bit of a tease, and loves to just be a pest, but she is the sweetest thing ever and we love her so much!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET GIRL! You are so special to us!

Milestones, rekindled love, & extra thoughts......

2008-11-13T10:10:00.000-08:00

Ok, so my SIL Amanda just texted me and said..."UPDATE YOUR BLOG GIRL" lol.....so I decided I better do an update, lots has happened, milestones have happened....and love has been rekindled.
I'll start where I left off....which was wks ago, so nevermind, I have no idea where I left off....I'll start then with the most important of all.....A'JAYE TURNED ONE! Yes, our little JJ turned one...I cant' believe how fast the year has flown. She has been such a trial, such a blessing and such a special spirit in our home. This little girl went thru SOOOO much to come into this world that everytime I look at her I can't help but think how special her life is that she even made it here. She is special and will accomplish special things in her life. She has already touched our lives so much and that of her sisters. WE all melt when she enters the room you can't help it w/that smile w/her two teeth showing, and her chubby cheeks w/dipples you can barely see. We love her so much....she is a good baby with such a good temperament. She does get mad though....and when she does look out....she'll let you know it. I look forward to her nap time, and I look forward to her waking up, cuz I know when I walk in that room to get her, her eyes will light up and that smile will bring a bad day good again.
Another milestone happened too....and I WISH so bad I could post a pic of this, but my stupid computer won't allow me too. (I'm getting a new one soon) A'JAYE IS WALKING! She just took off on tuesday Nov 11th. She has been trying off and on now for about a month, but she just took five steps and was so proud of herself her chest puffed up and she smiled so big like she had done the greatest thing in the world. She looked at me and I could tell she was just aching for a "atta girl" SO I played it up big......we had a big clapping party and cheered and yelled....she was so proud of herself it was so dang cute. She still is doing the "stiff leg" walk as Aaron would call it...lol...but she is walking everywhere now. I have to WATCH OUT! cuz nothing is safe. She walks into the kitchen to say hi to mom...and she comes around the corner just clapping away, gosh, its like the best thing in the world to see first thing in the morning....your heart just melts. Her dad and I could watch her walk all day....we'll just sit there in awww, like she just became president or something. We are so proud of her accomplishment she's been working hard on that one for awhile now!
Well what else....OH yes, the love thing...... Aaron and I were able to rekindle our love this last wk and wkend, which I must add, was INCREDIBLY wonderful, and very much needed. Aaron had to go to Las Vegas on business for the SEMA and NACE conventions for the latest in Autobody technology and products. His boss sent him down there to check it all out and to talk to vendors and businessmen. SO it was half for business but half for us, and Aaron was totally amazing down there. I felt like his newlywed wife next to him. I think every couple needs that once in awhile to just refresh themselves and get away and realize what you got married for. It seems like you get kids, and a career and a household and you forget what brought you together, you get into the same rut day after day, and your eyes become blind to the love you have for one another. Getting away even if for one night brings you back to those days when a kiss on the cheek, and when he grabs your hand to hold it as you walk down the sidewalk makes you all giddy inside.
We had the BEST time together. We realized that we were getting older and Vegas just wasn't the same as it was 7-8yrs ago when we used to come down once a year in our early 20's. We only stayed out till 11pm-midnight and sitting in the lounge listening to the band people watching while we held hands became our fun together, but we had GREAT talks that we needed to have, and we reconnected which was so nice.
None of this would have been possible for us if it wasn't for my mom, Amanda, and Aaron's mom Sandy. As you all know we have 4 little girls...(duh, as if I needed to remind you all) and 4 kids for 4 days can be a daunting task for anyone....we split it up so each mom had the girls for about 2 days each which I hoped helped and worked out ok. I know the girls had a blast. The first night I was down...the night before we left we stayed at my moms after we had JJ's bday party. Aunt Amanda took Ash and Der home w/her to have a girl slumber party. My goodness did they have fun there. They are now into the Brady bunch....lol, and they now want to live with Auntee AManda. They haven't stopped talking about how much fun they had at the slumber party that night. Then thursday night and fri night they stayed at my mom and dads.....my mom turned the living room into the playroom where she had dollhouses, and barbies, kitchen sets, and dishes...dolls and strollers, you name she had it out. (which this is hard for my mom cause she hates clutter....) The girls had a ball just playing. Their cousins Pais was there with them which was great to have her there to play, and having Auntee Amanda's help was great for grandma I am sure. Grandpa took them to the park, which they ALWAYS love to go there, its always a treat. Grandma Sandy picked them up on Saturday morning and took them fishing for the day, and they went and seen a movie saturday night. They got spoiled at BOTH places, of course, and they had so much fun spending time with their grandparents. It was good for them, and SOOO good for us.
We just want to say THANKS so much to our parents....we truly appreciate this, we know its not easy taking on 4 kids sometimes but we really needed that, I can't even tell you how bad we needed that trip, and it wasn't possible without your help. SO THANK YOU from the bottom of our hearts! I think the entire trip refreshed us all....... I was kinda worried about my motherhood though cuz when I go away I miss my kids alot, but this time, I just really didn't. I mean, I did.....I missed their smiles, and their kisses and hugs, but I didn't miss the everyday work it takes to raise them. It was refreshing to be away from that for a few days. Even Aaron said to me saturday morning...."gee babe, you haven't boobed about the kids yet".....and I was like..."Nope, I havent...." I knew they were fine, and in VERY good hands, I knew they were having fun and not sad so I was fine. It makes it easier when you know the ones they are with love them just as much as we do. Its comforting.........
On the way back sunday...as we approached the house to pick them up, we both took a deep breath, and said...."OK, fantasyland is over, its back to the same ole......." but then I realized that it doesn't have to be the same ole same ole, its up to us to keep our lives exciting and full of fun and laughter. We have the most exciting life anyone could have, if we just look at it that way. Look at our girls, they are beautiful, full of life, funny, and they give us life, and keep us young if we will only let them. As far as each other, YEA, its hard sometimes to find time for each other, but we know that we have to, even if its to sit on the porch at the end of the day and talk for a minute or go for a walk together......or our famous thing to do, sitting on the bed, and talking for hours.....its important to find that time for one another....GOD first, SPOUSE second, KIDS third..... I know its hard sometimes to put your kids after your spouse, but if you want your kids to have a healthy relationship, then you must FIRST show them how much you treasure yours......I heard this at some point at a relief society lesson, and I kept thinking....How do you put your spouse first before your kids.....??? but I think I get it now....by doing this, you teach your kids your value your relationship with each other and thats important for them to see. Of course you have to keep it all in perspective and it doesn't mean you just take off every weekend for the sake of your kids, lol.....BUT, it does mean you value each other, and show your kids your love one another. I think Aaron and I are pretty good at that, our girls are always saying....."EWWW YUK" and then we'll here whispers and giggles in the background..."mommy and daddy are kissing again" thank goodness I have a husband that loves to kiss me, hug me, hold my hand, and smother me with "i love you's" daily......and he doesn't care who is around....his boss, his friend, my friends, etc......makes me feel valued.
Just one more thing and I'll shut up, I promise....... I just have to say, that I am looking SO forward to Thanksgiving this year. Its the Lloyd clan get together which is always a trip....lol, the food, the fun, the laughter, the family......crowding in to one house, one table, I can't wait! Its my favorite holiday by far. I'm so exciting to b around my family, cuz I love them so much, and I miss being around them. I can hear Trisha's laugh, and I can see Dad standing back with that proud look in his eyes (almost teary) as he watches his family, and what he's created....his chests puffs out almost, as he thinks...."LOOK WHAT I DID" or maybe he's thinking...."yea, look at what I did...." lol... and mom, just loving being with her kids, cause her kids are her life and even though its chaotic its wonderful all at the same time. The brother's the sisters..... the cousins running around playing, the babies crying......and all the in laws that married into this crazy family thinking to themselves....."This is the craziest family I've seen" I JUST LOVE IT! I can't wait, and i hope you all are there....YOU BETTER BE! Thanksgiving is the one Holiday I remember that mom made JUST right....( I mean she made every holiday just right, but....this is my fav) the jello salads, the ordervs, the turkey, grandma's rolls, MASHED POTATOES and that gravy....OMG, I am salivating just thinking about it...... I still have two wks to wait! It will never get here......lol
Anyway, just had to throw that in there......can't wait to see you all there
LOVE YA All

The last two weeks.....

2008-10-25T13:30:00.000-07:00

Goodness, what a crazy two weeks we've had. After our crazy trip to Mesquite the following wkend we went camping with the Lloyds. It was fun, but I feel badly that i didn't get to visit much w/my brothers. I stayed in the camp trailor w/my mom and sister pretty much the entire time cuz A'jaye and Kymbree were sick. It wasn't really cold on friday but saturday the wind picked up and it was pretty chilly. They were already sick and I didn't want them getting worse.
The older girls had fun w/their cousins so it was worth the trip. I also got to visit alot w/my sister Chelsee which I don't get to often even though she lives 20min from me! (yes, that was a dig at you Chels, haha) I know she is extremely busy and under a ton of pressure and I have been up her way several times and didn't stop just cuz its hard w/the babies they usually are tired and want to get home or we are running late to be where we need to be. So, it was nice to be able to visit w/her. The nights in the trailer were LONG..... I don't sleep well anyhow, and A'jaye doesn't sleep unless she has her bed so it was long nights for everyone sleeping in the same trailer as us. OH WELL! We had a great time, and it was nice to b able to see everybody and do something as a family. NOW LLOYDS.....we need to do this MORE often! Its a lot of work, but its worth it to be able to spend time as a family.
Aaron, didn't go with us AGAIN....lol, he had his deer tag he had already paid for before we planned this trip. He went w/his dad and brothers down to St. George to hunt. He said he had a good time w/his brothers, dad, brother in law, and his 3 nephews. He enjoyed hanging out w/his nephews more then anything. Poor guy, doesn't get to hang w/little boys to much, lol. He didn't get a deer, but he had fun. We all returned home on that sunday evening VERY TIRED, but time well spent w/family.
I am still working on getting my computer to upload photos, hopefully SOON. I want to be able to show off my kids someday to everyone.
The week following our trip camping we were all in the sick pin, except for Derian and Ashlynn they are still free and clear. I was terribly sick sun, mon and tues....luckily for me the babies were sick too, so they didn't require to much assistance, they sorta just layed around w/me all day. We got by till daddy got home, then he took Kym, and I took A'jaye and went to sleep, cuz he was sick too. Aaron is still sick, I am feeling better and Kym is...A'jaye is still a little under the weather, but doing better.
I feel badly Trisha, that I didn't get to spend time talking to you and seeing Porter, sorry! Maybe next time.....
The girls yesterday had a Halloween party combined w/all their friends. There was about 15 little girls here ranging in age from 7-10yrs old. They had a great time and I had fun watching them have fun. They did most the work in getting it ready, and planned it, and did all the invitations. I told them if they wanted to have a party they had to do it, and they did. I was proud of them cuz they did a good job, and they were proud of what they did too. I was glad when it was over, but it was fun for them. There was some cute costumes, some scary ones, and some funny ones.....CUTE KIDS!
So thats been our life in a nutshell the past wk and a half. My house is a mess cuz I havent done anything all wk, and I am TO TIRED today, but I gotta get w/it. Aaron is at work now fixing my sisters car and working on another project he needs to get done, when he gets home we want to chill out and watch a movie w/the kids. So, I need to clean up some and make our house liveable at least.
Hope you all are doing better! I know alot of my family has been sick....SORRY if it was us that past it on...
LOTS OF LOVE to you all

Our lives the last few days.......

2008-10-14T07:03:00.000-07:00

Goodness, its been a busy few days. I feel like I have done nothing but run sense Thursday. Today I want to do nothing and I can't. I have a TON to do.
This past weekend we went down to Mesquite the girls and I and my mother in law Sandy. It was Aarons Grandma's 80th birthday party. She flew in from Oregon and we hardly see her so we went on down for that. It was nice for the kids to see all their cousins and they all played hard. The weather was great Friday but turned off way cold Saturday. That didn't stop the kids though, they played all day outside in the wind.
The birthday party was nice, and it was good to see everyone, but MAN...going anywhere with 4 kids is a nightmare. I guess I reminded myself why I don't go anywhere with 4 kids.
IT was all worth it when it was over. We got home late Sunday evening. We went from about 50 degree's in Mesquite to 30 degree's coming in to Utah, it was a defiant shift in temp. COLD!
Aaron went down to Colorado to hunt trophy Elk w/his dad. He got down early afternoon on Friday and went camping up these beautiful mountains. He said it was just gorgeous. Unfortunately he didn't get his dad an elk, but they really tried. He said that they had a great time, and anytime he gets to spend w/his dad is time well spent. He loves to be w/his family and spend time doing fun things w/them. He said they laughed so hard every night that his gut hurt. They left for home early Sunday morning and we beat them home by a hour and half. We were all so beat from the weekends events that we crashed at 7:30pm.
I feel badly because I took pictures of the entire weekend, we painted pumpkins, and I got pictures of our trip, BUT.... my stupid computer won't import the pictures. I downloaded a program that my dad showed me on google and now my computer won't allow the import UGGH! SO I thought I would be able to show you all pictures and I was so excited to share them. BUT NO! It isn't happening w/this pile of computer that keeps getting viruses and bugs. Its time for a new one!

So, then I have to clue you all in on our softball game last night. IF we won we went directly to the championship game that is tonight at 8pm. Just about everyone showed up to play which was nice that I didn't have to play. It was so cold! I had NO business having the kids there w/runny noses all ready, but we stuck it out. I kept saying "we're going to go" but then it was just two more innings, one more inning, and then it was over and we were OUT OF THERE! The kids hands were numb! I felt awful. Anyhow, back to the important game. We were dominating that team, killing them up to bat (we have a strong batting line up), we were up by like 10 points, and then the last inning they were up to bat and they killed us. One home run after another. We fell apart. Our entire team messed up! I don't know what happened but we fell to pieces. They got within 1 point and still had a couple batters. The other team won by 1 POINT! IT was terrible! So now tonight we have to play 3 games in order to win the entire thing instead of playing just once. We have a game at 6pm, if we win then we play at 7, and then the championship game is at 8pm. I think we can do it, especially with the really good players coming tonight we have a GREAT chance of winning it all. We are unbeatable w/the strong players. Actually, we are unbeatable w/just our players that come each time, we just fell apart that last inning, but tonight we have coming our strongest players that play alot so our chances are HIGH....w/them coming and everyone doing their part we are unstopable. SO, we are hoping we take it all, and we can still do it, we aren't out of it yet, but its just going to be harder is all. 3 GAMES...... in one night is going to tire anyone out. I will let you all know how we do.... tonight is the last of it we will either walk away with the trophy or walk away loosing it and coming in 2nd or 3rd.
That was my weekend and Monday.... its been busy, and tiring, but I guess staying busy is better for anyone. Now I have a housefull of housework, and not drive to do it! If I don't get it cleaned up I am afraid Aaron will fire me......lol!

Decision making begins.....

2008-10-08T08:09:00.000-07:00

Well, I have decided with my dear husbands support (because I WILL NEED IT!) to go back to school this winter quarter. I want to get started quickly. We found out that my degree from Provo College (that was useless for the longest time) in business management Associates Degree can now be transferred so I can use it at other colleges to put me further ahead by 2yrs. Which was sorta the push I needed. Even better is that my grades were at a 3.8 or higher for the two years I attended so I may be able to get scholarships as well.
I am going back to school to get my Master's In Psychology. I am finally going to do what I have kicked myself for NOT doing in the first place. I have ALWAYS wanted to do counseling sense I was about a junior in high school. It just seemed so long and I guess I didn't believe in myself enough to do it and make it. I have sense realized that you should do in life what you have a passion and drive for because it makes you WANT to do it, and learn about it because the passion is there. I also feel that my life experiences will only help me be a better Psychologist and maybe I needed those life experiences first before beginning this road.
I have always had an interest in the mind. I don't know that I am good at it, but I know I have a passion and drive to learn about it like I have never had for anything before. I have struggled with this decision, not because it is going to be hard, and not because it will take awhile, but because I feel guilty. I feel guilty because I am a mother of four beautiful girls that need me & I am going after something that will make me happy, make me feel proud of myself, and make me feel a success that I crave. I guess it sounds selfish, and mothers need to be self-less, not selfish. I think to myself WHY can't I just put that energy and passion into my girls and family to make my family successful and my girls confident and set them up for a successful path in life, that should bring me the success I crave, it should make me proud of my life and I should have a passion for that more instead.
Although its true that guiding my family down a successful road would bring me a sense of accomplishment and make me feel proud, make my husband proud and all that good stuff I guess I decided that if I feel fulfilled in my life then I am happier, which makes my girls happier. It also shows my girls that they can do anything they want to do no matter if they are a mother or not. I guess I am sorta feeling like lately more then ever that I am dead inside and I need something to make me feel alive, not that my kids and family don't do that for me but I think that by doing this it will make me a better mother. I tend to do better when I am busy with things, it keeps me driven and going, when I have nothing really to do then I become stagnant. I also just feel, and have felt for soooo long in my heart strongly that there is a reason I have to do this. I don't know for sure what that reason is, but all I know is the drive to do this is STRONG, its a burning in my heart telling me that I NEED TO DO THIS, its what I am meant to do, and there is NO reason I can't do both. Sure it will be very hard, but it will be very worth it.
It will take me about 4yrs to get all the way thru, and then theres internships and things like that you have to go thru clinicals and then pass your state boards to practice. There's lots of decisions I have to make like where I am going to go. I know alot of colleges are offering night classes, and online courses, which from what I have found out quite a bit of the classes I can take online, but there are alot that I don't want to. I would rather take them in class, but some of the less important ones I can take online, with no problem. I know I will be busy the next few months figuring out the details and putting together all the details so I can get on with this. IF I would have started this when I first started looking into it I would be two years into it already, DANG! So, I decided last night with my husband that its time to stop putting off this desire. A very good friend of mine said once to me and it has never left my mind it pertains to going to school.... he said, "You have to live those years anyhow, they will pass you by no matter what, so why not do something with those years" This quote has been running thru my mind for the past 2yrs, so its time to stop hoping, dreaming and wishing, and ACTING on my desire to do this. Its a long journey but a journey that I will enjoy every step of the way, and when I can walk across the stage with my degree it will be a happy day. I figured out last night that when I graduate Derian will be about 14, almost 15, Ashlynn will be 13, Kymbree will be about 8 and A'jaye will be 6. My only hope is that I will be able to find the balance between school and family.
Here are some of the reasons that helped me with the decision to GO FOR IT........
* My passion for this is extremely high
* The burning in my heart telling me that this is what I am meant to do
* My husband telling me he would support me all the way.... (this was a huge thing for me)
* I am only getting older, and I dont want to look back at 45 having regrets
* I want to contribute to my families dreams and hopes for the future instead of putting it all on my husband's shoulders to fulfill those hopes
* When my kids are grown and gone, what will I have? Yes, I will have my family still, but I don't want regrets that I didn't do this
* Because I can't help myself sometimes in giving my opinions and unsolicited advice on marriage problems, personal problems, etc..... why not be able to do it without my husband looking at me like...."BABE, quit being Dr. Phil" haha ( I had to throw this in there)

SO, here we go........................ I am not looking back!

WE WON THE BALLGAME!!!

2008-10-06T21:07:00.000-07:00

SO tonight is Aaron's Company Softball team league games, and its the finals. THis has been family tradition now for gosh, 4yrs or so. He has organized, and coached the company team for the last two jobs he has worked at. 2yrs ago we won the tournament which was great. Last year wasn't such a good year for us but we played and had fun.
Well, this year he organized and is coaching again Central Autobody Softball team and he loves it. Even though we are more out of shape and a little older we still love it. I am not a every game player but I come ready to play at every game. The girls love to go and play around while we watch the game, eating ballpark hotdogs and nacho's. Its become what we do for our monday night family night, I guess.
Well tonight I showed up NOT wanting to play at all, but Aaron calls me as I am pulling in and tells me to hurry up I am going to have to fill in..."MAN, I DONT want to play" the girls were anry, tired and hungry and the older two were not happy about having to help out with the youngens, but o well, what you gonna do?
Anyhow we had a game at 6pm. We were behind and it wasn't looking good. We had holes all over in our outfield and was short handed. Aaron sticks me out in outfield between him and another guy because I SUCK! lol.... and they have to cover me, but thats ok, I can hustle if I need to. IT so wasn't looking good and finally we picked up speed and started playing well. WE didn't have a good defense but we kicked their butts at bat.
We ended up winning the game which pushed us up a bracket, and meant another game we had to play tonight at 9pm. I told Aaron he better hope someone showed up to take my place because the girls were tired, and COLD! My goodness fall is in the air!
Well luckily he did get some one to cover me, but we decided to stick around and watch, so we thought. We had about a hour before it started so we tried to kill time, but as time grew later the girls just couldn't hold out and Aaron insisted I go home with them beings how cold it was. I didn't argue, however Ashlynn decided to stay with her dad and hang out. We both agreed she could stay this once.
Well he just called me and said they WON THE GAME! YEAY!!!!!!!! That means we are ONE MORE game closer to winning the tournament which would just be awesome. I will keep you all posted on our winnings. We play again next Monday at 8pm if we win then we go to the final game. I am certain we will get at least to the final game because we have an amazing team, and what makes it even more amazing is we are really good friends and co-workers. We have played with most of these people for 3-4yrs. I hope we win, Aaron says he doesn't care as long as they have fun and stay at least competitive (he hates to be swept), but I know he does care, he wants the trophy to take back to the shop, I know he does! What a guy (wink)!

Life w/my 2yr old........

2008-10-06T00:15:00.000-07:00

Oh my goodness. We are about 2months into the school year now and I am ready to loose my mind. I've decided that being home with just Kymbree, an ambitious two year old and my 11mo old baby, A'jaye whom is content to play quietly IF only she could...... her sister won't seem to leave her alone for more then a minute so it leaves A'jaye screaming for help and Kymbree loving it that she has accomplished her goal of making her cry LOUD!
I don't know how a sweet, little, blonde haired 2yr old girl can make me laugh and cry all in the same breath. SERIOUSLY! How is that she can have such control of me? Ok, ok.... I get it...I ALLOW her too. I buy in to that comment to some degree, BUT I also have to say that from day one this child has just been a challenging one to deal with. I mean, really, I had two babies back to back, two in diapers at age 23 & DID IT ALONE for 5yrs with them just about. (just for the record, I wasn't divorced, separated or without my dear husband entirely, he was working out of town and at home on weekends only, and working a part time weekend job too, so he was NEVER home, but not by choice) and I did not have NEAR the hard time coping with them as I have these two babies that are 23 & 2wks apart (yep you got the math right, almost 2yrs apart to the day) and with my husband by my side every evening and weekends.
I will admit to all the world right here right now, I AM DEFEATED by a little, blonde hair, grey eyed, sweet munchkin butt 2yr old toddler. Some days I cry, some days I laugh, some days I do both. Aaron and I were talking the other night about the differences in the two sets of kids that are almost 5yrs apart. Two families almost it seems. We have Derian and Ashlynn whom are 19 months apart raising them both up was enjoyable. They were and still are (at times) best friends. I never regreted for a minute having them close together even when I was told how hard it would be. IT wasn't hard at all, I for awhile, even recommended it to people (can you believe it). I have sense retracted my recommendation because I've realized along with my husband that EVERY set of two children, 5yrs apart ARE indeed different. OR....... is it that the parents have changed?
Aaron will tell me that I am not as strict with Kymbree or A'jaye as I was with the first two. Maybe that is true, maybe not, I don't know. I do know that with Derian and Ashlynn I don't feel that I took enough time out to cuddle, kiss, love and play with them and so when Kymbree came along I had realized that they are only little once and I wanted to enjoy that more......however I took it OVER THE TOP. HOw??? Well, Kymbree didn't even attempt to sleep in her own bed till she was well over 18mo. I nursed her till well over a year old (which isn't a bad thing), and she rules the house TO MUCH! With A'jaye I learned from my mistakes with Kymbree and I don't allow her access to our bed and she has slept in her crib from day one, just fine. However I take time to love, and cuddle, kiss and play with her just fine. I guess I learned how to balance discipline and love.
I never thought that I needed Super Nanny but now I have admitted that I may indeed need her! My two year old, although sweet as can be, RUNS ALL OVER ME! and is SASSY, BOSSY, SPOILED, but soooooo hilariously entertaining too. I guess I will take pride in the fact that although she is a monster child for me SHE DOES obey and do well in other ppl's care. So respect, she has, and sweet she is, good for her mom, SHE IS NOT!
All in all, we love her, and we couldn't make it thru life without her! My little Kymee K..... the one that says.... "you meany mommy, YOUR MEAN MOMMY, I Wuv you meany mommy" (all with a scowl on her face) GOTTA LOVE HER!

TAG WHO AM I......

2008-10-04T10:58:00.000-07:00

Tagged.....Who Am I
It's who I am ....I am... who I am take it or leave it, like me or hate me.
I Want.... to be a better wife, and mother and I want to go back to school
I Have.... the most supportive, and easy going husband, and my kids are amazing
I Wish..... I could learn to communicate better with my husband I SUCK at it!
I Hate... messy and disorganized, yet my life is full of clutter and disorganization.
I Fear... what lies ahead for the future, loosing any of my family, not raising my kids to be the best they can be, & war
I Hear.... quietness....O CRAP, I better ck on the kids, NOTHING good comes of quiet in a house full of kids!
I Search... for ways to better myself, I search for inner strength, and I search for shoes for Kymbree even though she has a dozen pairs.
I Always... tell my husband I love him whenever we part, and before I go to sleep.
I Usually... go to the gym every morning at 5a.m.
I Am Not... the best wife or mother, though I am trying to do better
I miss ....moments alone with my husband, living in Redmond and hanging with my mom whenever I want to.
I Sing... in the car....alone or not.
I Never... am nice to myself
I Rarely... go to sleep without first staring at my husband and thinking how much I love him b4 I go to sleep. I also rarely get out and do something fun.....
I Cry... alone more then I cry to others or around others
I am Not Always... the best person I can be.
I Lose... my freaking Driver's License all the time
I'm confused..... about how to raise a self respecting, secure, daughter, and I have 4 of them!
I Need... to clean my house and be more militant about my kids helping me clean and do chores
I Should... not be on the internet right now, but rather cleaning and doing laundry
I Dream... of being the best mom, and wife, and being a sucessful counselor for families and couples
I tag Maradee and Amanda.....

Grandparents day.....

2008-10-02T10:41:00.000-07:00

Well today was grandparents day at Barnett Elementary. The third graders all invited their grandparents to school for a small program and lunch. My mom and dad came up for the occassion. Derian was delighted. She woke up and said to me..."mom I have to look extra nice" Of course she looked beautfiul as always.
Derian wants to thank grandma and grandpa Lloyd for coming up from Aurora to have lunch with her and watch her in her program. It meant a lot to Derian. I remember when I was that age and had grandparents day at the school. I was sad that my Grandpa Lloyd wasn't there, but I knew that he was in heaven looking down on the moment. Its wierd to think that I now have a 3rd grader....man how time flies.
I PROMISE PROMISE to get some pictures up of my kids and events that happen in our life. I just need to get a picture program for my computer then we will be set to go.......

Well, We made it thru, sorta???

2008-09-27T17:46:00.000-07:00

Well this week is over, and we can breath a sigh of relief a little. All the prayers, and fasting did help and God came thru for our little A'jaye.
Her valve pressure number when we had her tested was at 98, normal is 20 so as you can see her number was way to high. It was no doubt that we had to go in and fix it, something that Aaron and I new that we would have to have done at some point we just were hoping that we could get her thru infancy before we needed to do this.
We took her to Primary Childrens along with Grandma Sandy, Grandma and Grandpa Lloyd & Grandpa Kurt along side with us, and all our other family back home praying for her. Aaron and I had a break down the night before surgery and held each other as we cried and let all our frustration and fear out. We had been so aunry all week and we finally let it out.... we didn't sleep at all and got up early to give her a blessing and head out all together. We arrived there at 10am check in time, and got called back right on time. She couldn't eat anything after 830 and I was so worried she'd be hungary but she did really good. She was so cute, with the nurses, and dr's and was just in a good mood, UNTIL..... the lab nurses came in, to take blood and do her IV. I was so angry at this point because they told me from the beginning they wouldn't stick her IV in until after she was asleep so when they came in to take her blood they thought they might as well do it then, I WAS MAD! but Aaron kept me calm so I didn't knock a nurse out. This broke my heart.... it took them awhile and alot of tears to get it in, and she wasn't happy. Every dr that came in to see her she would show them her IV, and tell them off...it was hilarious. So then it came time to take her down to the surgery room. This is what I dreaded from day one. We met all the team, and they showed us throughly what would happen and what they would do. Then I had to say good bye. She went right to the nurse and waved bye bye to me, and I sobbed all the way back up to the waiting room. We were both so scared. They told us it would take 2hours and they would page us when she was done, or if anything happened.
We decided with our family we would go grab a bite to eat so we headed to the cafateria. We all got lunch and just as we were finishing up the pager went off. It had only been a half hour. Aaron and I dropped what we were doing and ran. We didn't know what was going on. We knew her numbers were bad so we new they couldn't be done. I told myself as I took the elevator down to the surgery room that if I seen nurses and dr's running around I would flip but until I seen there was chaoes I would keep calm.
We walked nervously up to the doors and rang the bell....out came her nurse, she made eye contact with us so we new it wasn't bad. She smiled and said..."Good news, her pressure number is back down to a high normal (40) so they didn't go in and do anything" My heart calmed back down, and Aaron sighed a big relief. The Dr came out and just smiled and said, we aren't doing a thing. She looks good and its more risky to go in then it is to leave it alone for now."
Part of me was happy, and relieved and the other half was saying....MAN, so do we have to go thru this again in 2months, JUST FIX IT!
But I know that its a very risky procedure on such a small baby and the older she is the better chance it has to work. I just hate to see her go thru this. They wheeled her out, and I looked at her as she went by me... she looked so calm, and angelic laying there. I touched her face as they wheeled her by, but couldn't go with her just yet cuz the dr was still talking to us. He looked at me and smiled and said, "dont worry mom, they will take good care of her"
He then took us up to the recovery room where she would wake up. Aaron and I walked in to this room and there were all these kids, some sick, some hurt and parents holding their hands. I thought to myself "I AM BLESSED, my baby is fine, and things could be far worse" I waited for her to wake up, while Aaron went out to explain what was going on to our parents. She woke up and looked at me and wanted me to hold her. She looked down at the dang IV and cussed me again for it still being there. It didn't take her long to recover and shake off the medicine they'd given her and we were on our way in less then a hour for home.
I was holding her as we walked out of there, and all around us was kids and parents you could tell some were just so sick and I looked back and my family behind us, and just felt this overwhelming love and thought to myself, "at least my baby is coming home with me, we are leaving happy"
I know that she still will have to go thru some tuff things, and Aaron and I will have to be there going thru it with her hoping that we could just do it for her, but we know that her condition is fixable and very manageable so for that I feel blessed.
A'jaye has such a special spirit about her. Her smile lights up the room, and you can't help but smile or laugh every time she grins at you with her two single teeth and her eyes lit up. She was sent to us for some reason to be apart of our lives, and our family, maybe to teach us patience and faith, ..... maybe to teach us to be more appreciative of life and our blessings. Whatever the reason she was sent to us to raise and love we are so thankful for her and the light she brings to our family. She feels our life with love, and happiness just as all our other girls do.
Aaron and I are very blessed parents......
Thank you to all our family that prayed, and fasted for A'jaye I know that prayers are answered and that God had a hand in delaying this surgery for A'jayes sake.
So for now we just monitor her, and hope that she can wait till she is older to do anything else.

OH MY!

2008-09-24T07:34:00.000-07:00

Well its wed Sept 24th. Tomorrow is A'jaye's surgery and I am now forced to deal with the emotions of it all. I don't want to! I have avoided the subject, I have avoided the thoughts and now its here and I have no choice but to go there in my mind. I have been relatively calm about it suprisingly but its also not been something I like to think about at all either.
I know that I am calm about it because I feel that she will be fine and that things will work out fine. My only fear is I don't want her to experience any pain, or discomfort, and I also fear that she will have to go thru far more then we want her to have to go thru. I don't want her to have to go thru a ton of procedures, and surgeries to get it right. So I just hope that things will work out and she won't have to worry about anything after this point.
I have spent more time down on my knees in prayer then I have in a long time. I have a lot of faith that things will be ok, and I have comfort in my heart that things will be fine but you still, as a mother, have those fears and doubts.
Aaron and I went out to a concert last weekend for his birthday, and it was nice to just not worry or think about it for an evening. Although it was his birthday, I needed the out more then anything. I feel like a brick is on my head and the nerves in the pit of my stomach are horrible. As my dad & mom always say, its just a bump in the road. Hopefully this "bump" will not turn into a huge boulder, but I have faith that it won't and we will all come out of this a little stronger and a lot more greatfu for the things we are blessed with.

The story of our life......

2008-09-22T09:31:00.000-07:00

Some friends and family have now got me blogging..... Here is a little bit about our family.

Aaron and just celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary, that makes us being together for nearly 17yrs! (HOLY COW!) We are more in love now then we have ever been, and our relationship just keeps getting better and better. WE are best friends and enjoy each other's company at the end of the long day. We moved to Payson Dec 04, almost one year after our house in Redmond was lost in a fire. WE love it here but wish that we had more family around us closer.
Aaron has been working at Central Autobody as the General Manager now for almost 4yrs. He loves what he does and he has worked really hard and made lots of sacrafices to be where he is at today in this inudstry. He has always enjoyed fixing wrecked cars and now he enjoys running the shop even more. I am really proud of him, and although he is very humble and would never admit it (so I will for him) he is one of the most respected managers in Utah County and very well known among insurance agencies through out Utah. He is trusted, respected, and very much appreciated because of the hard work he puts forth EVERY day. He always goes the extra mile no matter what and I am just so proud of him. It makes me crazy some days because he does go the extra mile and it makes him work long hours but he provides well for our family and for that I am greatful.
When he is home, however, he is home and doesn't let work get in the way of our family. He is a great father to his 4 little girls and an amazing husband to me. He is involved in a lot of different things he does a bowling league, he coaches and plays on the company softball team, and he golfs at charity events and businesss tournaments. He stays very active yet is really grounded.
As for myself I have been running a daycare sense 05. I started out with 13 kids I was watching, now I have cut back to only 4 part time plus my 4. It brings in a little extra and keeps me busy. I have been making a point the last 6 mo to get healthy and make my family healthier too. I enjoy excersising daily. I go to the gym almost every morning at 5a.m. I know that sounds so early, but it really does relax me. Its sorta my break from it all and I can clear my head. Its more therapuetic then anything. I have beent rying to eat healthier and loose weight, and just be fit. It has given me something to do for myself and i have really enjoyed it. Life is busy with the kids but I do try to get out at least once a month with my friends, and Aaron and I try to go on a date at least 2 times a month. We still try to date each other as often as possible it keeps us refreshed and gets us out away from the kids.
Our kids are our life and we feel so blessed that we have amazing kids. Derian is our oldest. She just turned 9 in July. I can't believe we have a 9yr old it seems like yesterday that we had her. She thinks its really wierd that she was born in the hospital we now live behind yet we were living in Redmond at the time. It is sorta ironic. She is a ver sweet little girl that is turning into an amazing young lady. She is very gifted and talented and will do well no matter what she does in her life. She is very smart and is at the top of her class every year. Last year she got so many rewards that it took up our entire fridge. She enjoys school and doing well in it. She is a good artist, very creative, and loves to learn new things. She enjoys her friends and is so sweet to everyone. She is a good helper to me with the little ones even if she doesn't want to. She's a people pleaser & her and I are very close. I hope as she gets older we can continue to keep that bond.
Next is our little Ashlynn. She turned 7 in April and she is my beautiful brown eyed blonde. She is very active and loves gymnastics. She to is very smart and works hard to learn in school. She's a bit shy, yet very outspoken and not afraid to speak her mind when she needs to. I would say she is very honest, and sometimes honesty isn't always the best policy,.... (i.e... like telling someone there shirt is to short, or their hair looks like they just woke up). She is very curious and loves to find out things about bugs, and icky things like why people burp. She is a very loving older sister too even when she doesn't want to be. She's very protective of her two baby sisters and keeps a close eye on them usually beating me to the stairs to save the baby. She's very ender hearted and needs a lot of love and attention. I am proud of her and the little lady she is becoming.
Then our little Kymbree Kathleen. OH me Oh MY! THis child is the cutest, sweetest, yet stuborn and thick headed all in the same hour. She is my fit throwing, in the grocery store screaming kid. I usually DONT take her grocery shopping because she is all over the place, always making new friends with other shoppers. She is very friendly and not shy at all, and she has been that way from a very young age. She will go up and talk to anyone and she's so cute, with a little screachy voice you can't resist talking to her. She is going to b a very talented gymnast someday she already has so much talent and she just barely started classes. She is very strong and shows so much interest in it. She still sleeps with mom and dad which sometimes its so nice to have her cuddled up next to me and other nights I just want her outta there, but we try to cherish every moment because the grow so fast. We know that Kymbree is going to go far in life she is mean and stubborn enough to get there!
Last, my sweet A'jaye. She is such a good baby. She will play contently for hours on the floor as long as Kymbree will leave her alone. She is cuddly and her smile lights up a room. She has the prettiest eyes the shine when she smiles. We just love her and she was a good way to end our family. She is such a blessing to us and I can tell already she has such a strong spirit.
I think thats all of us..... Well I guess I forgot the new addition to the family, Zoey the Boxer pup. We got her in June and she is now 7 or 8 mo old. She's just a pup but she is going to be a good dog. She loves the kids and loves to play soccer with them. She waits and waits for them to get home from school. She's been a good addition to our family. Sometimes I kick myself because it is one more thing to take care of and clean up after but my kids love her to pieces and that makes it all worth it.
Well enough is enough! I love bragging about my family....... I am one lucky women, and our family is very blessed.